


Murderer

by unwanted_doubt



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe - Serial Killers, KageHina - Freeform, Kagehina centric, M/M, More tags later, No idea where this is going
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-04
Updated: 2016-06-22
Packaged: 2018-02-16 03:31:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 27,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2254221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unwanted_doubt/pseuds/unwanted_doubt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kageyama thinks Hinata is acting strange. Hinata thinks he's convinced Kageyama he's fine. Kageyama thinks the knife that Hinata just embedded into a mans chest couldn't really be real. This couldn't be real. Hinata couldn't have killed someone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First attempt at a Haikyuu!! AU. Sorry for the grammar! And the huge bits of out of characterness

Kageyama jumped a few inches in the air and slammed the ball over the net. He landed heavily and grunted angrily. He watched silently as the small orange wind-up toy dove for the receive. He curled his lip slightly as he saw a body slam into the ground and heard the satisfying  ‘thwack’ of volleyball hitting skin. The ball spun up into the air over the net and bounced down on his side of the court. He watched and waited for Hinata to get to his feet, he waited for that inevitable yell of joy that he usually did when making a difficult receive yet it never came.

Hinata picked himself up and brushed off his shoulders. He looked at Kageyama and smiled. He moved back into the receiving position and waited. Kageyama pulled a face, that was a difficult serve and the orange blur was not only quiet but not fidgeting like normal.   Normally he would sway gently waiting for the ball, his eyes would light up but tonight there was something else going on in that brain of his.

But Kageyama knew how to break through to him. “You look tired shorty, that all you got? I could play better in my sleep.” He sneered the word _shorty_ out, knowing it would send Hinata into a furry but nothing happened. Hinata simply put up his hands and gestured for him to bring it, his expression not changing.

Kageyama picked up the ball and walked confusedly to his serving spot. He ran forward and leaped into the air. He hit the ball just as it started to fall and it shot out from his hand over the net. Hinata moved in a blur and easily returned the serve straight back at Kageyama.  Knowing Hinata wouldn’t expect it he made a split second decision to spike the ball back over. He got as close to the net as he could and spike the ball down hard over the hit. It hit the ground behind Hinata making his eyes go wide. Kageyama smirked as he saw Hinatas’ expression. At least that was still the same.

Hinata stood up and weakly made eye contact. “I think that’s enough for me tonight Kageyama. I’m shattered.”

Kageyama almost believed him but he knew Hinata better than anyone. They had been inseparable for so long. He could read the instant Hinatas’ mood changed but he was struggling to figure out what was wrong with him tonight. They always practised together after the team practise, just the two of them. It wasn’t tiredness, tired Hinata wouldn’t stop, tired Hinata kept practising until he collapsed.

“Whatever weakling.” Kageyama said defeated. If volleyball didn’t fire him up, what the hell would?

Hinata grabbed the ball and disappeared to the changing rooms leaving him standing there unsure what to do or say. It was difficult for Kageyama to talk to him sometimes. At times he wanted to simply ruffle his hair and tell him he played really well but what came out was a string of criticisms and slight verbal abuse. How the words changed as he spoke them, he would never know but the harder he tried to be nice to his best friend the worse it got.

He tidied the gym and went into the changing room, as Hinata was leaving. He tried to walk passed Kageyama but he grabbed his arm roughly.

“What the- Kageyama, what are you doing?” He said a little too defensively.

“What the hell is wrong with you? You’re acting like a depressed freak.” Kageyamas brain screamed at him, _that’s not what I meant to say!_ How did, “you’re acting strangely, I’m worried. Are you okay?” turn into that?

 “Nothing and if it was it certainly isn’t any of your business.” Hinata shook off his grip and stomped out of the gym, into the night.

Kageyamas’ brain was spinning, what on earth was happening? Why did his words hurt him so much? Why did they feel like he had betrayed Hinata? His heart beat in his chest in worry. He slapped his face and muttered out loud. Maybe he’d called him trash a few too many times and he couldn’t handle it anymore. Was it his fault that Hinata didn’t shine on the court tonight? He had been normal at the team practise even pulling off some impressive quicks but when they were practising just the two of them he had changed like someone had turned off his light.

Kageyama stomped around getting changed, locked up and headed home alone. He would normally walk with Hinata until their paths spilt but not tonight. He was long gone and Kageyama stayed stuck in his own head long after his head hit the pillow that night.

\---

Hinata stormed off from the gym, cursing himself loudly. He had been doing so well all day and he couldn’t keep it together when it was just Kageyama and him. He’d been reckless. This hit he had to do was eating away at him. It took all of his effort to keep his life a secret from everyone but Kageyama had wormed his way in and Hinata struggled to keep him out. He fumed at himself, how could be so stupid to let Kageyama see him struggle with his job. He needed to get home and get his act together.  They could never know. Kageyama most of all. Hinata didn’t want to lose him.

All of his effort and energy had to be in planning. He had only twenty four hours left. Tomorrow there could be no more failures, no more slip ups. His act had to be perfect, he could break down after tomorrow and that would be fine but he had to sell that he was fine tomorrow.

He battled with himself on the way home and sat on his bed laying out his tools on his lap. The blades glistened in the moonlight.

Hinata sighed. His mother had left with Natsu four months ago; he had been left with his stepfather. He didn’t want to change schools Karasuno was his home. His job was there. His team were there. Kageyama was there. He couldn’t leave.

He stretched out over his bed and fought with himself. He rolled up his kit and threw it into his go bag sitting next to his school bag. He took off his shirt planning to get into his child-like pajamas when his hands grazed the scar on his abdomen. It was a long thin recently acquired scar that he had ended up when he had had a difficult time dealing with a work problem. He was lucky he was quick and small or his body would have been a lot more scarred than it was. Sighing he threw on his pajamas and curled into his bed. He heard his stepfather shouting down the phone angrily. One more night, he told himself.

Then he would be dead.

\---

Kageyama woke with a start at his usual time. He was panicked from a dream he couldn’t remember. His heart pounded in his chest. He had a feeling the dream was related to Hinatas strange behaviour. He jumped into his clothes anxious to get to school and check on his friend. He had texted him the night before but had no reply.

He hoped he could figure out what had thrown Hinata off and wanted desperately to not be the reason himself. He rushed through the halls of school, racing to his homeroom, noticing the unmistakable crop of ginger head through his classmates.

He regained composure and wore his typical morning face or at least tried to. He walked towards Hinata.

“Yo.” He stated standing next to the shorter boy’s desk.

Hinata looked up at him smiling and wobbling around in his chair. “Morning.” He chimed. He scratched his head, embarrassedly. “Sorry I was in such a grump yesterday, I was worried about Mum and Natsu. I’ll be better at our practise today!”

Hinata oozed with positive energy like normal but his expression worried Kageyama. Was he really alright? It made sense he was worried about his family but it didn’t feel right. He fought his body and put a hand on Hinatas shoulder.

“If you need to talk, I’m here.” He blurted quickly so his mouth couldn’t betray him again.

Hinata looked more shocked than Kageyama had ever seen, his jaw dropped at the speed of light. Kageyama flinched at the pure happiness that was being beamed at him; he raised an eyebrow and muttered “Trash.” Before taking a seat behind Hinata.

He watched Hinata ride out the shock and start fidgeting almost instantly as he sat. Kageyamas heart slowed considerably, he sighed. He wasn’t the reason Hinata was weird. He could breathe again and watch those eyes widen in any situation that the shorter boy was in.

It had gotten easier being in the same class as Hinata. Half of his original class had been accepted for an exchange program for six months in the United States. The school had lumped the classes together to even out the numbers and save time for the teachers having to reteach lessons twice.  Hinata had made him sit behind him the moment the move had been announced. It had driven Kageyama mad the first week but then he saw the improvement in their teamwork on the court and stopped trying to fight it. He was almost sad that he would eventually have to go back to his class.

Hinata sat in his chair a ball of energy. It was exhausting to him. Hinata thought to himself maybe Kageyama had bought his act, he must have to make a gesture like that. He pondered for a moment and realised that might have been the nicest thing that he had ever said to him. All it took to get it out of him was struggling to deal with having to kill your stepfather. Hinata often wondered how his life would be different if he had been able to have a normal life. He felt like he was living three lives, is school life, his volleyball life and of course the life that he hid, the life that made adrenaline blast through his veins.

He had been six when he first killed a man. His first vctim had picked up the small ginger from the supermarket while Hinata had been shopping with his mother. Hinata had wandered off as kids do and found himself being taken out of the store into a car. He couldn’t understand what was happening but when he saw the man pull into an alley in a gang run neighbourhood and begin to unzip his pants, little Hinatas brain fried. He grabbed the nearest thing and stabbed the man in the next. He had grabbed a pen; he could still see it sticking out of the man’s neck when he recalled the incident when he was older. The man had probably thought he was younger than six because Hinata had always been small for his age which might have saved his life. He had run from the car and fled, eventually being picked up by the police and returned to his panicked mother. The full details were fuzzy from age, but the image of blood pooling down the mans neck stuck with HInata.

From there it had spiralled out of control. The man had been part of a local gang that had seen little HInata run from his car. When Hinata was eight they made their move, noticing that he had been able to get away with the kill. It first started as a threat of them exposing him and killing his family. Over the years he had started to really enjoy the feeling of watching the lights in his vicitims eyes go out. It was when he was eleven when he realised he had become the local hit man. Hinata himself had been nervous at first but found that his appearance was a good way to lure his targets in. He had learned to stop asking why his targets deserved death very quickly. He was good at his job and it paid him well. He had enough money saved up to never have to work again; he himself had protection should anyone ever decide to come after him. He liked the freedom of his life. He liked the darkness to contrast his other selves. It pulled him down and he drowned in it.

He had received target information the previous day which was why he had struggled with Kageyama. He was torn. His birth father had long abandoned his mother, but Hinata had only ever known life with his stepfather. Horrible life it had been. The man wasn’t on the right side of the tracks and his mother had finally had the courage to leave him. Hinata was ignored so he was fine with staying. His mother had cried and begged him to come, but Hinata couldn’t leave his home. He couldn’t abandon his heart as dead inside as he was, it still beating for someone close. He had laughed to himself that it would be his stepfather that needed to be careful around him not that other way around. He was still unsure about this job and it had bled through him and the worst person saw. He never wanted Kageyama to see this side of him.

His shoulder buzzed from the spot where he had grabbed earlier. Hinata tried not to blush. Kageyama could through off his whole day by doing one thing without even knowing. Hinata cursed him silently.

Hinata breathed out a sigh of relief at the end of class. He quickly bounded out of the room and heading directly for the gym, Kageyama trailing behind him. He was chattering away about nothing mostly about wanting Kageyama to toss to him and promising that he would get better in all aspects of his game.

Kageyama of course agreed. “Got to get your skills better so you stop dragging us down every game we have.”

Hinata pouted as they entered the gym. “Maybe if your tosses weren’t so slow…” the threat hung in the air and Hinata knew from Kageyamas expression that he was going to pay for that.

Throughout the practise the whole team felt Kageyamas furry. How dare that orange fuzz ball criticise _his_ tosses with receives that bad. He grimaced at the back of Hinatas head, trying really hard not to hit the ball into the back of his head or yell abuse.

“I have a favour to ask Kageyama.” Hinata carefully asked him as the practise came to an end. “I can’t practise tonight.”

“Oh that’s rich. How many tosses did you miss, ten, twenty? You’re pathetic.” His eye twitched as he spoke. “You’ll never be any good.”

Hinata boiled, anger rising in him. “Shut up. I’ll just practise harder tomorrow night.”

“What makes you think I’m going to want to practise tomorrow? It’s the weekend.”

Hinata snorted. “Because its volleyball and you’re you.”

“Fine. Whatever.” Kageyama dismissed him.

Hinata jogged off to get changed and quickly reappear as Kageyama was talking to Suga about their rotations. Kageyama eyed Hinata carefully as he ran out of the gym. He was never that quick to leave practise. Where was he off to?  He zoned out.

“.. you have to be a little less angry on the court Kageyama. Hinata won’t respond the way you want if you are constantly belittling him. We are a team right?”  Suga lectured softly, trying not to enrage him more.

“Yeah yeah, sure Suga.” Kageyama mumbled. “Ive got to get going…”

He trailed off and left a very confused Suga standing watching him get ready to leave. Kageyama grabbed his school bag and left the gym in his sports clothes. His mind a million miles away.

“What gotten under his skin?” Daichi asked Suga.

“No idea.” Suga shook his head.

The watched a flustered Kageyama storm out, neither sure what was going on with their setter. Kageyama himself didn’t know what was going on with him too. He felt disgruntled and frustrated that something was still not quite right with Hinata and he was angry at himself for being so worked up by thinking about Hinata.

He sat at the park a few blocks away and stared up at the darkening sky. Letting his thoughts flow, trying to put pieces of a puzzle he knew nothing about together. He couldn’t stop thinking about Hinata. He realised that since he had met the orange haired player Kageyama had never seen him like this. What had changed. He worried that he would leave the team and that meant no more one on one practises just the two of them. His heart jumped into his throat.

He groaned out loud softly. He knew why he was so worked up, he had finally realised why his heart kept doing that and he groaned. It smacked him in the face, how had he not realised sooner? He didn’t want this, theses feeling would only make him put more pressure on himself not to stuff everything up. He held his head and bent over expecting more worry but he felt relieved. He felt happy. He felt butterflies.

He liked his best friend more than he was supposed to like his best friend.

There was a low rustle from behind him. It sounded unnatural and strange. Kageyama got up and followed the noise, pushing through the bushes.

There in front of him was the very boy who was running through his thoughts only seconds ago.  He was pinning a man twice his size to the ground and held a sharp knife above his head. Hinata was straddling the man who was gagged and trying to escape. Kageyama emerged from the bushes and stared at Hinata as he swung the blade down deep into the man’s chest. Blood leaked from the wound as Hinata forced the knife deeper. The man stopped moving.  

“Hinata!” Kageyama cried out unable to stop himself.

He saw Hinatas small frame, stiffen when he heard his voice.

Hinatas heart dropped when he heard Kageyamas voice. He would know that voice anywhere. This was not how this was supposed to go.

“Kageyama?” Hinata whispered in disbelief. This couldn’t be happening. He couldn’t be here. Anyone but him, Hinata begged.

He turned his head slowly to face Kageyama. There was paleness to his face and an expression on his face that broke Hinatas heart. He took a step towards him and Kageyama flinched.

“Who are you?” He asked in horror. “You’re not my Hinata.”

Hinatas heart jumped when he said ‘his Hinata.’ Any other time that he could have heard Kageyama say that would have made Hinatas life complete.

“Please let me explain.” Hinata begged, trying to approach the taller boy.

Kageyama had frozen. He couldn't feel anything, he was in shock. Had he had a stroke? Hinata held up his hand and slowly stepped closer to him. Kageyama breathed deeply, his eyes wide with terror.

Hinata was close now and gently held his hand up to Kageyamas cheek. He touched him softly. If this was it for him, the end of the road, then he was at least going to show him how he felt before he ran away and never saw him again. He couldnt bear the thought of killing Kageyama to keep himself safe. Kageyamas eyes were still wide in shock, he had no idea what was going on.

Hinata pulled the taller boys face down to his level and kissed him gently on the lips.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata worries what Kageyama will think about his two new relevations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the randomness of this story and the bad spelling/grammar (oh it's so bad), it's very hot where I am and my brain is melting. Still not sure where this is going but hopefully for a few more chapters if people are enjoying it :) Thank you for reading!

It had been a long day for Kageyama. He’d sat through some long classes, had practise, realised he was in love with his best friend, witnessed a murder by said best friend and was currently being kissed also by said best friend.

His body was ridged as Hinatas lips touched his. He watched the smaller boy reached his hand up to grip his own neck and pull him deeper into his kiss. He felt himself part his own lips and venomously willed himself not let himself feel the way he wanted.

Kageyama watched trapped in the moment as Hinatas eyes, so very close to his, fluttered gently. He could feel Hinatas skin against his and it sent his heart rate through the roof. He thought he was having a heart attack, in fact as the moment lingered his head grew heavy and his vision blurred. His brain finally took notice of the small drops of blood sprayed on Hinatas face. Kageyama swayed before collapsing. He crumpled into Hinatas arms, passed out.

Hinata himself had been lost in Kagayama. He couldn’t describe how it felt to finally reveal his true feelings. Sure it would have been nice if Kageyama hadn’t had such a shocked wide-eyed expression as he kissed him but Hinata would take what he could get before things got complicated. When he had pulled him closer and felt from under the kiss his setters’ lips part slightly Hinata couldn’t help but greedily try to kiss him harder.

However even having him faint seconds later couldn’t ruin it for Hinata. He caught the taller boy as he fell and lowered him to the ground using Kageyamas backpack as a pillow. He stood looking down on the comatose Kageyama breath slowly and swore loudly. It was the moment of truth time. Did he run now and never look back, vanish from everything he knew or stay and ride out whatever happened even if that meant being caught by the authorities. Hinata grinded his teeth. If Kageyama went to the police Hinata would be arrested and most likely be put on death row. His previous victims could easily link to this kill and Kageyama could testify seeing Hinata commit this crime. He couldn’t risk getting caught. He tried not to think about what that meant for the boy lying unconscious in front of him. He bit his lip as he tried to consider how he would feel killing him there then, while he was lying defenceless.

“Fuck.” Hinata swore again. He whispered. “Why did it have to be you? I could deal with anyone else but you finding me.”

Hinata looked down at Kageyama one more time and bent down to kiss his forehead. He brushed his fringe off his face and touched Kageyamas cheek softly. It felt warm beneath his fingers. His heart jumped into his throat. Kageyama was getting out of this situation living he decided and if that meant his own death Hinata would deal with that. For now he had work to do.

He looked back at what was left of his step father and his kit carefully placed next to him. He hoped that he could get the disposal over quickly and before Kageyama woke up. Hinata rummaged in his bag and found his plastic apron, throwing it over his head and quickly tying it behind his back. He sighed picking up one of his larger knives. Putting on a pair of rubber gloves he went to work, rolling the body on top of large black sheets of plastic. He slowly started breaking his stepfathers’ body into smaller pieces.

Hinata remember the day earlier when he was conflicted about killing him. He laughed darkly, how silly had that been. The man was a monster. Hinata was a monster and now Kageyama knew that too. This wasn’t the first body that Hinata had cut up, he worked quickly and wrapped up the remains in the plastic, duck taping them shut. He ended up with four medium sized packages that he carried to a rubbish bin not two metres from where he had stabbed his stepfather. The packages fit easily in the bin. He threw his gloves, apron and kit with his bloody knives in it into a plastic bag before stuffing them into his backpack which he threw over his shoulder. He pulled out his phone and his fingers dialled a familiar number.

“Joeys Pizza. How many we help you today? We have a deal on large pizzas tonight, two for the price of one!” A cheerful women blurted down the phone quickly.

Hinata grimaced against his phone and spoke in an overly happy tone. “No order this time, but I wanted to give my compliments to the chef. The pizza I got for my stepfather was delicious. He loved it.” He paused and said up as much fake positivity that he could muster, “Thank you _so_ much.”

The voice behind the phone sounded equally as positive. “Thank you so much valued customer! Please order from us again!”

Hinata hung up. He was a seasoned killer and could fly through the disposal part of his job quickly. He was always careful and called for collection if it was needed as soon as possible. He didn’t like making his employers dispose of the remains but the few times they had it had kept the police off his trail. Hinata had seen on the news that some of his victims had turned up at various places throughout Japan. Some even as far south as Fukuoka. He knew he didn’t have long until his stepfathers’ remains would be collected by garbage workers, sent by his employers. He didn’t want them to see Kageyama with him. That was not going to happen.

He checked the time. Kageyama had been out for almost fifteen minutes. He frowned. It was a long time. He crouched down beside him, and put his ear to Kageyamas chest. His heart beat was slow and he breathed shallowly.

Hinata considered his options. Seeing him like that must have really shocked Kageyama but it wasn’t healthy to still be unconscious now. Hinata was nervous for him to wake up; he wiped his forehead with his shirt and breathed out. He gently reached out to hold Kageyamas shoulders. Hinata could feel his shoulder muscles beneath his gym shirt. He shook Kageyama carefully.

“Kageyama.” He whispered, scared his voice would traumatise him further. No response. Hinata shook him a little stronger. “Kageyama.”

Hinatas’ hands jolted off Kageyamas shoulders as he stirred. Kageyama winced and raised a hand to his head. He groaned. His eyes still shut.

“Everything is spinning. Make it stop.” He grumbled forgetting who was sitting next to him.

Hinata stayed silent unsure what to do. He looked at the ground patiently waiting for Kageyama to remember. His hands gripped tightly together on his lap. His whole being in knots. There were electric sparks in Hinatas heart.

Kageyama bolted upright, eyes wide again. He looked pale and glared at Hinata when he locked eyes with him. His eyes flashed menacingly at the smaller boy.

“What did you do to me?” He spat angrily, his face a mix of rage and confusion.

Hinata hung his head. “You fainted.” He mumbled sadly.

Kageyama couldn’t decide what he should do. He wanted to punch Hinata, hug him close and run away from him as fast as he could go all at the same time.

“Not that!” Kageyama yelled. “What did you do to _me?_ What do you do to _him!?!_ ”

Hinata flinched at his tone, not meeting Kageyamas face. He wasn’t ashamed of either thing that he done but Kageyamas voice was cutting him like shards of glass. Kageyama had been angry with him before many times, but this was different. Hinata felt like dying, this was the worst feeling he had ever felt.

Hinata didn’t answer him and kept his face down refusing to see the emotion he was hearing. He breathed deeply trying not to completely fall apart. He felt like he was suffocating.

“Answer me you psycho!” Kageyama snapped.

“I kill him.” He said quietly, shutting his eyes. He didn’t want to see this. “It’s my job.”

“…And!” Kageyama barked at him.

Hinata could feel the glared aimed directly at him. He shook his head saying nothing, words drying up in his throat. This wasn’t how telling his feelings to Kageyama was supposed to go; this wasn’t how anything was meant to go. Hinata wanted no one to ever see him like this. Seeing Kageyama like this was destroying his soul.

He felt a hand under his chin; Kageyama slowly lifted his face so it was almost impossible for Hinata to avoid his glare. Hinata fought against his hand trying to bring his chin down again. Kageyama grunted in anger loudly and clasped Hinatas cheeks with both of his hands stopping Hinata from staring at the ground again.

“Look at me, damnit. You piece of shit.” He barked. “Look me in the eye.”

His words stung. Hinata blinked back rising tears and struggled not to look at Kageyama. He locked eyes with him and felt his insides turn to ash. Kageyamas face was twisted in a look of hate and fear.

“What did you do to me?” He asked the orange haired boy again. Stressing each word slowly, glaring down into Hinatas eyes intensely.

Hinata could have easily overpowered Kageyama and escaped off into the night but he was stuck where he sat, his legs made of concrete, his very life crumbling around him.

“I kissed you.” He blurted quietly, failing to hold a tear back.

Kageyama couldn’t even begin to comprehend that Hinata had admitted to killing a man and that it was his _job_ to do so, so he was focussed on the one thing that he could handle. Kageyamas eyes twitched and narrowed. His forehead furrowed. “Why did you do that?” Still staring into Hinatas eyes.

“Please.” Hinata begged so quietly that Kageyama almost didn’t hear him, tears freely running down his face. “Not like this, _please._ ”

Hinata couldn’t deal with this. With every word his heart was being stabbed. He couldn’t survive this. This was worse than a million nightmares.

The hands on his cheeks stiffened. “ _Why!?!_ ” He roared at Hinata.

Hinata took a deep breath and tried to stare back at Kageyama who hadn’t stopped glaring at him. Their faces were close again. Hinata could feel Kageyamas hand tremble, still forcing him to face his friend.

“I,” He tried to say and stuttered. He took another breath and spoke with confidence. “I think I love you.”

Hinata was not expecting Kageyamas reaction. Hinata didn’t know what he had actually expected but he most definitely did not expect Kageyama to be kissing him, hard. Hinata leaned into the kiss, letting Kageyama explore his mouth with his tongue. The hands that had held his cheeks slipped through his short orange hair. Hinata shivered as they ran through his hair and stopped at his neck. Hinata sat up and pulled Kageyamas face closer to him, like the small distance between them was causing him pain.

Hinatas eagerness to hold Kageyama close wasn’t lost on him. Kageyama craved Hinatas touch; he ran his tongue over his. Underneath his embrace Kageyama could feel him tremble. He liked the feel of Hinatas hands on his back refusing to let him go. Kageyama felt like he was tasting sunshine, it burned through his body.

Hinata broke the kiss and took a deep desperate breath of air. He had long since stopped trying to stop his tears, which he could see some remnants on Kageyamas face. He buried his face in Kageyamas chest and his whole body rocked with sobs. Kageyama embraced him in a hug and stroked his unruly hair. Kageyama liked the feel of his fingers in Hinatas hair.

“I think I love you too, moron.” Kageyama replied softly into his ear, the insult had an enduring edge to it which made Hinata cry louder and stronger.

Hinata had never felt such relief, his tears were a mixture of alleviating stress and worry and happiness. He didn’t want to move from this position but knew he they had to. He pushed away from Kageyama and stood up. He awkwardly held out a hand and pulled Kageyama to his feet.

“We have to go. We can’t stay here. They’ll be here soon, it’s not safe.” Hinata said seriously through his sobs.

Kageyama looked at the fireball, what on earth was this person? How could he do something so dark and then brighten up Kageyamas life so much? Who was Hinata Shouyou? Whoever he was Kageyama knew he could no longer live his life without him.

“Can we go somewhere to talk; there are more questions I need to have answered before this goes any further?” Kageyama asked in a warned tone. “I’m not sure which way is up, you need to show me, you idiot, because you have thrown my life into disarray.” He reached out and grabbed Hinatas hand. It felt like Hinatas hand only existed to fit into his own.

Hinata wiped his eyes with his shirt and stopped crying. He put on a serious face and pulled Kageyama towards the main path. “You’re coming home with me.” He ordered, leading him back towards the city.

Kageyama had never heard Hinata order him to do anything before, it felt strange. He begrudgingly let him lead him out. He was just happy to be away from the place of death but he couldn’t help a small smile creeping onto his face. He was terrified of Hinata but he was also madly in love with him and knew that he was loved in return.

What a day it had been, indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to the lovely comments! It might make me grin like a moron for hours :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo it's 9/10 today <3 Alright chapter three, all aboard the out of characterness of this whole story. Hopefully I won't run out of motivation or ideas for this fic. Bit of a smaller chapter this time. Thank you for reading!

Hinata had held his hand the whole walk back to his house. He had only let go when he spotted Nishinoya in the distance leaving the school. He had called out to the pair and waved furiously before disappearing into the darkness. When they started to walk again, Hinata had fumbled around for Kageyamas’ hand again.

“Dumbass.” Kageyama muttered at him grabbing his hand.

The rest of the walk had been silent. Kageyama hadn’t visited Hinatas home before; he let him pull him in the direction of his home. Doubt crept into Kageyamas mind. He was walking in the dark with a murderer, was this really the best idea, he didn’t know. Before today, he would have said that he was undoubtedly stronger than Hinata but after seeing him force the knife into that man’s chest he began to doubt that. He knew, from seeing him on the court and at practices, that Hinata was faster than him too. He felt trapped with him, like he didn’t have a choice. He wanted to be with Hinata but his brain kept trying to tell him otherwise. Logic told him to run. To never stop running from him but his body refused to flee.

Knowing Hinata had made him a better person; he had friends and appreciated them. He wasn’t miserable anymore, life was worth living again. He wasn’t alone. He didn’t want to lose what Hinata had done to him. Selfishly he wanted to be the person that knowing Hinata made him, he would fight to keep that. He tried to reason with his brain, after all he was still alive. Hinata had had time to kill him if he wanted after he had fainted. Yet here he was, hand in hand. He felt Hinatas pulse through his hand. It sent chills down his spine. Kageyama never wanted to let go.  

Hinata felt the same. He gripped Kageyamas hand tightly, lost in his own thoughts trying to pin down Kageyamas feelings. He wasn’t out of the woods yet. In fact there was a giant mountain to get over first and as that approached Hinata yet again felt the panic rise. Kageyama hadn’t properly reacted to his job yet, Hinata struggled to think how he would take hearing the actual story. He knew he had limited time. He was already doing better than he thought he would be.

He stopped on the footpath and dropped Kageyamas hand, turning slowly he faced him. “Before we go in I need to ask you something. In all seriousness, I understand if you are not ok with any of this.” Hinata said.

“Spit it out then.”

Hinata breathed in and his forehead crinkled in worry. “Do you trust me anymore? You’re acting so calmly about this whole thing, you’re not acting how a normal person would if they had seen me. Are you going to report me to the police?”

Kageyama was wondering that himself. He sighed. “I-“

Hinata cut him off before he could answer. “If you are tell me now and I will save you the trouble and I will turn myself in right now. I don’t want to drag you into my life unwillingly, Kageyama.”

Kageyama pulled a face. “Is it ok to talk about this out there?”

Hinata pouted darkly grabbing his hand again, roughly. “Fine. Be that way. I tried to give you an easy out.”

Before Kageyama could argue or speak he was being dragged up to the porch. Hinata unlocked the house and gestured for him to enter. He shut and locked the door behind him.

He kicked off his shoes, dumped his bag on the floor and folded his arms impatiently. He disappeared down the hallway and shouted for Kageyama to follow him. He was sitting on a chair in the lounge.

“Sit.” He pointed at the couch across from him. “Tell me your answer now then.”

Kageyama sat and looked around the room. No beating around the bush, he wanted answers to his own questions first. He bluntly asked, “What happened to that man you killed? His body was gone when … I …woke…” He trailed off suddenly, his eyes locking onto a photo on the wall behind Hinata.

 _No_ Kageyama thought staring at it. _No, it can’t be._

Hinata stared at him and watched the realisation hit Kageyama in the face. His colour drained and Hinata could see horror fill his eyes.

Kageyama grabbed his mouth and muttered, “I’m going to be sick.” He bent over suddenly.

“Not here.” Hinata panicked, ushering him into the bathroom down the hall.

Kageyama threw up into the toilet and started shaking. He fell to his knees and bent over the toilet further. How could kind, energetic, sensitive Hinata have killed one of his own family? His body convulsed and he retched into the toilet, Hinata rubbing circles on his back affectionately. Where he touched Kageyamas back, it burned. His touch was hot.

“Your dad _Hinata?_ ” He asked weakly face still over the toilet. He felt Hinata stop moving. He heard Hinata gulp.

“…my stepfather.” He confirmed. Kageyama convulsed again. There was nothing left inside his stomach. They sat on the floor of the bathroom in silence.

Hinata wondered if this was too much for Kageyama to handle. It was a lot to take in. Hinata knew he was a monster and that hoping Kageyama could look passed that was hoping for the impossible. He left Kageyama for a moment and returned with a glass of water, the stunned boy took it in shaky hands. He sat up slowly and downed the water, looking up at Hinata more sadly than Hinata had ever seen him look. Hinata wouldn’t have thought possible for Kageyama to be able to feel a crippling sadness but the proof was right in front of him. Hinata hated himself for doing this to him.

“Are you alright? Let’s get you back onto the couch to recover; you look like you might faint again.” Hinata suggested softly helping him stand. They walked back to the lounge with Kageyama using Hinata to keep himself upright. He lay on the couch and shivered; Hinata disappeared again and returned with a blanket. He carefully placed it on Kageyama, tucking it around his body cautiously. He sat on the floor, legs crossed, near Kageyama’s head.

“I’m so sorry Kageyama. I’m sorry I got you involved; it’s alright if you can’t look at me the same anymore.” Hinata apologized sincerely. “Whatever you want to know I’ll do my best to tell you. If you want out at any point you only have to say.”

Kageyama looked at him weakly. There were no words. It was like he was two people, his bubbly lovely best friend and being of darkness. “Tell me why.”

Hinata briefly recounted how he had ended up with such a bizarre job omitting parts about him growing to enjoy killing people. Kageyama lay still listening to every single word. His head stopped spinning as much but he couldn’t shake the cold that crept up on him.

“I normally don’t talk about it but the reason my mother left with Natsu was that he was abusing her. When she left she wanted me to come but I couldn’t. This is my home. I couldn’t leave because…” Hinata trailed off, unsure if he should finish the sentence.

“Because?” Kageyama prompted. Speaking for the first time in a while.

“He was providing for my mother and sister. I couldn’t do anything about that at the time and it hurt me to see her like that. I couldn’t leave with her because she moved down to Tokyo. I couldn’t move there. It’s too far away from…” He paused again and shut his eyes. “From you.”

Kageyama shot him a dirty look. “From me?”

Hinata nodded vigorously and blushed. “Playing volleyball with you is pretty much the only thing in my life that is important to me. Not even the volleyball so much. Being around you is the best part of my life.” He smiled gloomily. “You got me through some dark days without even knowing.”

Kageyama understood, he knew that feeling. Hinata had done the same for him; he never would have thought that Hinata was walking around every day with this kind of burden on his shoulders.

“How do you feel about your work tonight?” Kageyama asked nervously. He both wanted to know and didn’t want to know what could convince someone to kill a family member.

Hinata smiled darkly. Kageyama didn’t like the look on his face; it made the uncertainty of everything rise. “I don’t just randomly go around killing people Kageyama. I’m not a serial killer. I’m a hired killer. I do my job. I don’t question it.” Hinata embraced his dark side easily. He reached for his waist and Kageyama thought for a split second that he had a hidden knife under his shirt and was going to silence him but Hinata just lifted the shirt up over his head and took it off. Kageyamas heart pounded in temporary fear. Hinata threw his shirt behind him. Hinata waited for Kageyama to stop flinching and pointed to his chest. “These are ‘presents’ from my stepfather.”

Over Hinatas body were a variety of bruises. Ranging from old faded yellow bruises to a distinctly fresh deep purple one on the side of his body. Hinatas left rib cage was badly bruised, Kageyama wondered if Hinata had a broken rib. Instinctively Kageyama reached out a hand to caress the bruises carefully. He saw Hinata blush as his fingers traced his chest.

“This one?”

“He hit me while I was sleeping with a baseball bat. He had a deal go bad and lost a lot of money. It looks worse than it is.” Hinata stated in a monotone, trying not to stop Kageyama from touching his chest. Where he traced his fingers sent tingles down his whole body.

“Hinata that’s crazy. Why did you stay here if he treated you like this?” Kageyama asked confusedly.

“The money I make I give to my mother. She thinks it’s a from my grandmothers’ will, she died a last year and in her will my mother received two monthly payments but I started sending it after the will ran out. It’s very easy to fake a transfer. There is a small amount for me that I keep but it goes to my family to repay them and apologize for not being able to get them out of here faster and stop them from getting hurt.” Hinata repeated himself and stressed every word to Kageyama. “I don’t just kill people because I want to.”

Kageyama pulled his hand back under the blanket and shivered again. Hinata raised an eyebrow. He brushed Kageyamas fringe off of his forehead and checked his temperature. “I think you are still in shock, Kageyama.”

“I’m fine.” He said through gritted teeth.

Hinata stood up and shook his head. “No you’re not. You’re going to bed. Do you need help getting up?”

“No.” Kageyama tried to get sit up and promptly collapsed back into the couch.

“I’m going to carry you. You can barely even sit up. Hold still.” Hinata ordered.

Kageyama forced a laugh. “You could never lift me; you’re not strong enough. You can barely serve over the net.”

“Is that so?” Hinata scooped him up in the blanket and carried him bridal style out of the lounge. Kageyamas head resting gently on Hinatas shoulder. His feet stuck out of Hinatas arms so he carefully walked through the doorways and slowly made his way upstairs. “Someone is eating their words aren’t they?”

Kageyama glared at Hinata as they made it into a bedroom. It was dark and unfamiliar.

“Is this your room?” He asked and Hinata nodded. Hinata hit the lights and Kageyama blushed as he realised that he was going to sleeping in Hinatas’ bed.

There was a double bed pushed to the side against the window, a volleyball sitting on the floor and a desk. It looked barely lived in. Kageyama had imagined Hinatas room being beyond messy. The empty room was not what he was expecting. Hinata placed him carefully on the bed and pulled up the blankets to cover him. Hinata felt his forehead again, it was still ice cold. His forehead crinkled again. Wondering if Kageyamas body could handle the stress it was under.

He stood still and watched Kageyama shiver in his bed. He wanted to reach out to him and tell him everything was ok. That none of this was his fault; that Hinata would do anything he wanted to fix this but the words didn’t come. Hinata couldn’t make him feel any worse. He needed to let Kageyama recover from the trauma of the day.

He turned off the hall light and slid into bed next to Kageyama, wearing only a summery pair of sports shorts; his shirt still lay where he had thrown it downstairs. He leaned on the bed and looked down at Kageyama. Hinatas eyes went wide and shone with slight embarrassment. “Is this ok with you? I don’t want you to think you have to sleep in the same bed as me, if you don’t feel safe around me please tell me.”

Even though he was lying in bed with an actual murderer Kageyama didn’t feel worried. “It’s alright, I would rather have you next to me than not. You moron. Would I still be here if I thought otherwise? Don’t be an even bigger dumbass.”

Hinata smiled kindly at him through the darkness, even though he stuttered and shook the whole way through Hinata liked to hear him talk normally to him. “Won’t your parents worry where you are?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Kageyama rolled onto his side, Hinata facing his back now, trying to trap more heat near him when felt a small hand on his shoulder. He felt the bed move underneath him and Hinata wiggled closer to him and hugged Kageyamas cold back. He looped his arms around Kageyamas waist carefully. Kageyama felt the small boys heat radiate off him and through his gym shirt. He felt like the he had his own personal sun keeping him warm. Kageyama gasped as the heat started to spread through his body. He felt Hinata flinch against him and then went to move his hands away. Kageyama caught them in his and grumbled.

“Don’t you dare move away.” He ordered feebly. “I’ll freeze without you near me.”

Hinata had been worried that the sensation of his body touching Kageyamas had upset him but he couldn’t help his heart back-flipping at Kageyamas words. He nuzzled his face into Kageyamas back and listened to him breathe.

They lay still, silence hanging in the air. It was too early for Hinata to sleep; he still had adrenaline running through his veins. Every time he tried to shut his eyes he replayed killing his father and seeing the look on Kageyamas face again and again. He gripped Kageyama tightly; being able to hold him like this was something Hinata had wanted to do for so long. He dare not move again, scared he would make another mistake and lose him forever.

Was this really ok? Fooling himself into thinking Kageyama could accept him. Was it fair to ask him to even try? He felt the shaking stop and heard the taller boys’ breathing even out. Hinata assumed the day had finally taken its toll and hoped he had fallen into a peaceful slumber.  

He was everything Hinata had ever wanted and all he wanted was his love returned. He struggled with this thought, tears burning in his eyes. He quietly tried to hold them back.

“I’m so sorry. You were never meant to know. None of this was supposed to happen like this.” Hinata whispered softly, tears rolling down his cheeks gently.   

“Sweet dreams Tobio.” Hinata murmured, barely audible. He snuggled into Kageyamas back and battled his demons as he shut his eyes again.

Kageyama was still awake and heard what Hinata had said. He had whispered his name.

His first name. His. Name.

Hinata was contagious. Hinata had infected his blood, travelled around in his veins. Entered his mind and wormed his way into Kageyamas heart like poison. He couldn’t tear himself away even though he knew he should.

It sent sparks through him. Even in his tired stated he wanted nothing more than to roll over and taste Hinata again however the gently snoring coming from behind him prevented him. His head felt like it might explode, he had too many conflicting emotions. Sleep gradually crept up on him and Kageyama fell into a dark, dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the comments! Words can't describe my gratitude :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Got a little carried away with the thought of writing cute Kagehina that I forgot that I was trying to writing a darker story. Might have to write a side fluff story to get it out of my system. Thank you for reading!

Hours later Hinata woke up and found his head was resting on Kageyamas chest. Hinata looked up and saw a peaceful expression on his face showing that he was still asleep. Hinata felt arms around his shoulders and realised Kageyama was hugging him softly. This had been the best way Hinata had ever woken.  

Light shone weakly through the curtains and hit Kageyamas face softly. It made him glow faintly. Hinata tried to remember the image, afraid he would never see it again. He smiled at the gently ruffled hair poking out, defying gravity around Kageyamas face. Hinata tried to wiggle carefully closer to get a better view and felt the arms around him get tighter.

“Do you ever stop moving?” Kageyama complained quietly without opening his eyes. “Hold still you idiot.”

Hinata stopped moving. “Sorry to wake you.” He mumbled.

“It’s ok.” Kageyama replied, running a hand through Hinatas messy hair.   

Hinatas’ phone vibrated loudly, on the bedside table. He hoped it wasn’t work. Anyone else but them. He needed to recover. Hinata made an attempt to grab it only to find that Kageyama had pinned him in a hug.

“What did I say about moving dumbass? Did you not listen?” Kageyama griped.

“I would never have pegged you as a grouch in the morning Kageyama.”

“Quiet.” He hissed. “Let me lie like this for a little longer.”

Hinata obeyed and lay still, letting Kageyama hold him tightly. He could have stayed there all day but this phone vibrated again. He had to know. Hinata broke Kageyamas hug carefully and reached over him for his phone. He got up and sat on the side of the bed. Kageyama felt the heat from Hinata burn on top of this chest. The cool morning air sapped the heat away and his body ached to feel the warmth again. He wanted Hinata back in his arms.  

“Shit.” Hinata swore loudly reading his phone.

“Quiet, I’m tried Hinata.” Kageyama grumbled again.

Hinata shot up and fumbled around his room looking for a shirt. His bruises more noticeable in the morning light. He threw on a large, loose T-shirt and raced out of the room. Kageyama heard his footsteps thud down the stairs as there was a loud knock on the door.

Kageyama could hear Hinata talking quickly to a man. He couldn’t make out what they were saying. He tossed and turned, unable to get comfortable alone and decided to follow the orange haired boy down stairs. He was still in his gym clothes from the day before. As he got to the bottom of the stairs he saw Hinata take an envelope from a tall thin man in a black suit. He locked eyes with Kageyama as he hit the ground floor.

“Who’s that?” The man asked in a deep voice. “Aren’t you here alone now?”

Kageyama saw the back of Hinata stiffen. “He’s just a school friend, we’re practising volleyball today.” Hinata said quickly in a forced voice.

“Right, volleyball. I forgot you play.” The man mused. “Until next time.”

He looked passed the short boy and nodded at Kageyama. “Nice to meet you.”

Kageyama nodded back and watched the man walk out of Hinata house. Someone who forgot Hinata played volleyball? Was there anyone who actually knew of Hinata that didn’t know he played? He barely stopped talking about it, ever.

Hinata watched him walk out and disappear into a car and drive off. He walked out of the house slowly and looked down the street. There was no sign of anyone else around. It was still early. He closed the door and stared at it not wanting to turn around yet.

“ _Friend?_ ” Kageyama spat from behind him. “I’m your _friend_ am I?”

“To them yes. God Kageyama, couldn’t you just not make an issue out of this, please?” Hinata spun around and snapped back him.

Kageyama felt the anger in his words. “Is that all we are now? _Friends?_ ” He sneered, his feelings more hurt than he wanted to admit.

Hinata stomped over to him. “Fucking hell. Can you even guess who that was?”

Hinata reached out and shook him roughly. His emotions a mix of rage and frustration. “Take a moment and use that giant brain of yours and think about why I would have said that. As much as I want to sing out ‘I love you Kageyama’ from the roof tops maybe consider that I won’t because that would put your stupid life in danger!”

Kageyama looked down at him confused. “My life? How?” He asked seriously.

Hinata sighed, his anger fading. “Jesus, you haven’t even thought about what being with me means. You are such an idiot for someone who claims to be so smart.” Hinata stressed, earning a grumpy look from the taller boy. He tried a different approach. “If you had a personal hit man and you found out that they were dating someone, what would you think?”

Kageyamas brain connected the dots. “That you might reveal who you really were to them if you were really serious about them.”

“Finally.” Hinata rolled his eyes. “Even if they didn’t, you would be leverage for them should I stop doing what they want. So don’t get so shitty next time I say you are my friend, please. It helps that you are still in your gym clothes from yesterday though.” Hinata looked him up and down in such a way that Kageyama struggled to fight colour from rising in his cheeks.

Kageyama glared down at Hinata. His eyes narrowed and his expression dropped. Hinata locked eyes with him and resisted the urge to glare back.

“Don’t look so pissed, Kageya-“

Hinata never finished what he was saying. Kageyama had grabbed him and pulled him into a deep embrace. Hinatas body moved instinctively, his hands finding Kageyamas neck. They kissed with the passion of dying men. Hinata pressed into the taller boys’ body and forced him against the hallway wall roughly. Kageyamas hands tightly gripped Hinatas hips and he fought not to let them slip lower like he wanted to. The heat that kept him warm at night once again spread through his body.

Hinata was running a hand through Kageyamas hair, he moaned gently into Hinatas mouth. Hinata broke the kiss and nuzzled into his shoulder gently planting kisses down his neck. Kageyama shuddered, Hinatas heat was melting him.

“Hinata! Kageyama’s missing, I’m coming in!” Sugawaras voice bellowed from outside. Hinata recoiled, shocked, and jumped in the air. He rose just high enough to come into contact with Kageyamas nose.

“FUCKING HELL HINATA.” Kageyama screamed, hands racing to push Hinata away and to reach up to his face. Blood started to trickle slowly out of his nose. “Fuck!”

Suga barged in through the front door, in a panic. “We don’t have much time; we need to figure out where he…went…”

Suga stopped as he saw the blood on Kageyamas face.  Hinata was sitting on the floor stunned, rubbing the top of his head. Neither noticed that Suga was in the room.

“You fucking broke my nose, only a dumbass like you could do something so stupid!” Kageyama yelled angrily at Hinata.

“My head hurts too, calm the fuck down.” Hinata spat. “Stop bleeding all over my floor!”

“Children!” Suga snapped. He found two angry sets of eyes glaring holes into him. “What in seven hells is going on here?”

Hinata wasn’t actually angry at Kageyama he was angry at Suga for interrupting. He had liked what he was doing prior to crashing into Kageyamas’ nose. He sighed; Kageyama was going to be such an ass after this.

Kageyama was trying to retain his dignity and pinched his nose. “Get me some gauze or something before I get any more of my blood on your precious floor.” He tried to bark at Hinata.

Hianta sent him a dirty look. He stood up and bowed in an over the top fashion. “As you wish your majesty.” He said sarcastically pushing Kageyama into the lounge.

Suga was left standing in the doorway by himself, completely confused to what was happening. He grabbed his phone out of his pocket and furiously texted his captain. He relayed that he had found Kageyama safe at Hinata’s house. Now he wanted to know why.

Suga kicked off his shoes carefully and stomped down the hallway. He was met by a strange sight. Hinata was sitting on Kageyamas lap trying to wipe the blood off his face and give him first aid.

“Hold still.” Hinata grumbled, trying to put a small bit of gauze up his nose, wiggling around on Kageyamas lap a little too much for his liking.

Kageyama glared back at him. “This is your entire fault, you sit still.”

 “Guys!” Suga pleaded. “What the hell is going on? Where have you been Kageyama? Everyone has been freaking out.”

Hinata got up off Kageyama and packed up his first aid kit. “Hey Suga, sure come in. Nice to see you too.” He said drily.

Kageyama folded his arms, trying to look imposing with gauze sticking out of his nose, as Hinata sat next to him. “What I do is none of your business.”

“Why are you both being so defensive today? This is serious! Your mother is clawing at the walls, you didn’t answer her calls or anything. She freaked out and called Daichi thinking maybe we were practising late.” Suga explained, his hands on his hips.

Kageayama tried to feint disinterest but knew exactly what his mother was afraid of, and it happened to be sitting millimetres away from him. “I just came home with Hinata and we practised late and I just crashed here.”

“And you couldn’t reply to a text or make a quick call?” Suga lectured disapprovingly. “There’s a serial killer out there, you know that right. You remember all of the school assemblies and meetings we’ve had to go through lately. Jesus Kageyama, everyone thought you were dead.”

_I might as well be_ , he thought now realising Hinata had to sit through hours of talk about himself without cracking. What was he made of? Kageyama thought back to the night before and remembered how Hinata had stressed that he wasn’t a serial killer. That all his kills were targets. Kageyama was possibly in the safest place be could have been last night or at least he hoped.

“Hinata,” Suga shook his head.  Hinata’s eyes dropped sadly to the floor and Kageyama suspected that it was an act. “You know better.”

Kageyama couldn’t not laugh at that. Hinata most certainly didn’t know better. “Yeah, sure.” Kageyama said sarcastically. Hinata elbowed him angrily in his side.

“Shut up Kageyama.”

“Kageyama! Hinata isn’t stupid enough to just disappear at night without letting someone know where he was going. You on the other hand, I wish I could say I expected more from you.”

Kageyama wanted to laugh out in hysterics at the sheer absurdness of this whole conversation. The things he knew now would shatter his seniors mind.   

“I’m taking you home now. Getting this whole disaster over and done with. Grab your stuff and say goodbye to Hinata. You two can practise after school on Monday.” Suga ordered folding his arms impatiently.

Kageyama stood up and sighed. There was no point in arguing with Suga when he was like this. He wasn’t known as the ‘mother’ of the team for relenting. He looked down at Hinata who refused to meet his eyes. Kageyama grabbed his back pack off the floor and pulled Hinata to his feet.

Hinatas shoulders slumped and he looked depressed.

“Snap out of it Hinata. You can practise getting Kageyamas tosses once we get his mother calmed down. It’s not the end of the world.” Suga tried to reason with him, thinking that’s why he was upset and acting very un-Hinata like.

Kageyama knew it wasn’t volleyball that Hinata wasn’t happy about. He couldn’t say anything in front of Suga to attempt to make Hinata feel better.

“Ok.” Hinata grumbled. “You better bring you’re a-game to practise on Monday. You owe me some pretty fantastic tosses.”

Kageyama nodded.

“Right, come on Kageyama. Time to leave.” Suga left the lounge and walked out to the front door, Kageyama and Hinata in tow close behind.

Kageyama could feel the small grip on the back of his shirt. His heart skipped a beat. As Suga was putting on his shoes and he quickly spun around and kissed Hinatas forehead lightly. Hinata blushed red and his eyes shone like the sun. It was like he had been injected with energy.

Kageyama slipped into his shoes and looked back at Hinata who smiled at him. “I wish you would sing it from the rooftops. Because I want to too.”

Hinatas mouth fell open.  His eyes grew wide and he beamed at Kageyama, forgetting Suga was standing next to him, watching.

“Quit being weird you two. Come on, we should go.” Suga tried to usher him out the door.

“See you around Hinata.” Kageyama waved as he left.

Suga eyed Kageyama suspiciously as he walked him down the street. “What the hell is going on between you and Hinata? Something’s weird. You’re being weird.”

“He’s just excited that he gets to practise with me and my amazing setting skills.” Kageyama said subtly.

Suga squinted at him. “Ah huh. That so. How’d you get a bleeding nose?”

“Hinata head butted me.” Kageyama stated like is answered all of Sugas questions.

“I will find out what’s going on, mark my words.”

Kageyama held up his hands in mock terror. “Oh no, what ever shall I do? Scary Suga is coming after me.”

Suga refused to groan. They walked in silence the rest of the way.

It had taken his mother about an hour to calm down once Suga had personally delivered him home at eleven thirty on a Saturday morning. Kageyama stood like a statue as she hugged him and fussed over his nose in front of Suga. It would have been a nice moment if it had been an honest reaction and not an act. Kageyama wondered if it hadn’t been a Friday night that he hadn’t come home, perhaps a Tuesday, would she have even noticed. But Friday, Friday was her sober day. She reasoned she wasn’t an alcoholic if she didn’t drink every day of the week. So of course her stress was elevated as she couldn’t drink to make it disappear. It was the only day of the week that Kageyama could actually have a conversation that didn’t involve going out and getting her more alcohol.

“It’s _fine._ ” Kageyama said through gritted teeth. “My nose is fine.”

“But you look so pale, I should take to see a doctor.” His mother trailed off.

Kageyama had long since lost interest in playing happy families with his mother. He hunted for his phone in his backpack and saw the thirty odd missed calls. His mother mostly, a few from Daichi and Suga. He dismissed them and then deleted the many texts asking where he was. He sighed, one night and he had been rung and texted more than he normally would have been in a month.

His fingers lingered on a new message from Hinata that he hadn’t seen from the day before. His heart skipped a beat as he remembered the feeling of Hinatas body basically grinding on his lap as he tried to put gauze up his nose. He had rather enjoyed that. He smirked down at his phone, the old message was only one word.

“Kageyama?” He heard his name and snapped his head up. “Hm?” He grunted, his cheeks flushed with thoughts of Hinata. “What?”

Suga frowned at him. “I was just saying how I better be off now that everything’s alright here. Don’t be late for practise on Monday or even hiding at Hinatas won’t keep you safe from me.” Suga threatened darkly.

“Thank you for bringing my baby home safe for me, what was your name again?” Kageyamas mother gushed, a little too forced.

“Sugawara. It’s been a pleasure meeting you, I’m just glad it was a mix up and Kageyama is fine.” Suga breathed out, a breath he didn’t know he had been holding in. It had been a confusing relief to find Kageyama, but it beat the feeling he had when Daichi had rang him just after midnight in a panic. Suga had spent the rest of the night waiting for the morning, his brain playing out the worst scenarios he could imagine, only making his worry worse; he didn’t want to lose a friend.

Suga excused himself and then Kageyama was left with his mother.

“It’s Saturday you know.” He stated.

“Oh honey, I know and now you’re home safe I’m going out with a few girlfriends in a few minutes.” She said cheerfully, sweet irony hang on her words. “I was so worried about you.”

Kageyama watched her fluff about looking for her purse, realising that she had been drinking long before he had gotten home. He hoped Suga hadn’t noticed either. Kageyama had long since stopped trying to help his mother. Nothing he had done had helped; nothing he could do would stop her from drinking. She was one of the reasons he had shut himself off in middle school. He left the foyer and made his way to his bedroom. She had helped Kageyama build mile high walls around himself and Hinata had made them crumble. He had stormed into Kageyamas life not letting anyone stop him.

As Kageyama lay down on his bed he heard the front door slam.

“Great.” Kageyama growled at the ceiling. “All that hassle and she’s gone again. See you in a week mum.”

He was grumpy. He could have been with Hinata doing much more interesting things than lying on his bed alone. The universe was playing tricks on him. Here’s the love of your life, he loves you like you love him, oh and by the way, he murders people for money. Good luck with that kid.

He groaned. This wasn’t easy for him. When he was around Hinata now he could barely think straight, Hinata himself was too much of a distraction to allow Kageyama to process everything. He hadn’t felt threatened yet but then again he had only really seen the good part of Hinata, not that he wanted to see his other side. He shut his eyes and thought. He had to think this over.

He remembered the irritated look on Hinata face when he said that he couldn’t shout out that he loved Kageyama. That was an intense feeling and Hinata was very open about saying it in casual conversation. They had been team mates and best friends for quite a while and Kageyama only had just realised his true feelings, yet Hinata seemed to have accepted and acknowledged his own much earlier than he might have thought. Hinata was in a place where he was already comfortable saying such a heavy sentence in such an easy way. Hinata wasn’t the problem, the problem was what he did.

He rubbed his forehead. It was time for a shower and some clean clothes. He picked out a pair of dark jeans and a loose fitting printed T-shirt. He stood holding his clothes and a towel, watching his reflection. There was some dried blood on his nose. He carefully removed the gauze and checked that it had stopped bleeding. He locked his own eyes and laughed. He looked ridiculous. His white gym shirt had a few spots of blood on it. His hair was a mess from Hinatas ruffling earlier. No wonder Suga thought something was up. He didn’t stop laughing as he turned on the shower and undressed. He hopped into the shower, laughing manically unable to stop. He sat in the bottom of the shower, let the water run over his head as he clutched his knees and let the laugh turn into a quiet sob.

The water ran over his body until he couldn’t feel it anymore. Somewhere deep inside him he wanted to be ice cold. He wanted the heat out of his body. It didn’t feel like it was his. He felt like he had stolen it, like the way Hinata stole lives. The way Hinata was stealing his. Kageyama wanted to drown in him, to be burned to a crisp by him.

He looked up and was hit in the face by the water. The cold stinging his skin. The water mixing with what he assumed were his own tears of frustration and confusion. It was hard for him to come to terms with his decision but not matter how he put it, a life with Hinata wasn’t a life he wanted. It was too late to Kageyama to turn off what he had already let himself feel, he had gone passed running away.

He turned the water off slowly and started to feel better. The weight on his shoulders was shifting. Now it was just being able to deal with Hinatas secrets.

Kageyama dried himself off and dressed slowly. Wondering how long he had been in the shower. He picked up his phone. Flicked through his contacts and sent Hinata a message.

‘Dork.’

He hit send and moments later his phone beeped at him. He dried his hair off with his towel before reading the message.

‘What did I do this time?’

Kageyama could almost hear Hinata whine the words through the phone. He wondered what he was doing. Kageyama stood frozen in his bathroom, towel in hand, staring at his phone. He sighed; he couldn’t stop himself from the free fall he was in. He wanted to run back over to Hinatas house and just listen to him ramble about things that weren’t important.

‘You’re not here.’ He hastily sent before regretting it. Why did the mere thought of Hinata throw him off balance?

Hinata fumbled around in his jacket for his phone, Kageyama had replied to him. Hinata beamed as he read it. He dropped he knife in his other hand, trying to text Kageyama. He swore, this was a rush job too. Something big must be going down for his work load to be this high.

 ‘Ohhh you’re not sick of me yet? You miss me?’

He stuffed his phone back in his jacket and grabbed the knife from the floor. “Where were we?” He glared darkly down at his victim, she was sitting bound on the floor. Hinata knew he didn’t have much time left to get this finished with. 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

Having Kageyama be at the house when he received his next target was possibly the worst thing that could have happened but Hinata had managed to dodge that bullet unexpectedly. Suga frantically wanting to find Kageyama was endearing and had turned out to be a good chance to deal with this problem before he started working out where he and Kageyama stood. Although Hinata would have traded anything though to have a few more minutes in the hallway. He could still feel where Kageyama had grabbed his hips and pulled him closer.

He shook his head, trying to shake off thoughts of Kageyama. He walked over to the window and opened it. He was on the tenth floor of a building near the centre of town. It had almost been one of his easiest jobs. He bent down to the women and pulled off her gag.

“Last words?”   

“Stop! Please let me go! I can make it worth your while, I know lots of things. I can get you money. The police have promised me a reward once I talk to them today, whatever they’re paying you I will double it!” The women begged quickly as Hinata cut her bonds.

So this was why the job was rushed. She was a snitch. Hinata nudged her with his knife. “Go on.”

His pocket vibrating softly.  Hinata winced, wanting to take it out and read what Kageyama had sent but he couldn’t let his attention slip.

“Name your price! Please just let me live.” She screamed at him.

Hinata laughed. “No no no. You misunderstand. I can’t be bought off. The only thing that will change today is whether I kill you or if you jump. Which would you prefer?”

“But you’re a child. You can’t be a killer. Please whatever they have you to make you do this, I can help you.” The women held out her hand.

Hinata sighed. Expectations were funny, because he was short he must be helpless and weak. Because he was kind and friendly he must not feel the pull of darkness.

Hinata kicked away her hand and in one swift motion lifted her up by her shirt, pressing her into the window.

“Out. Now.”  Barked Hinata menacingly, pressing the knife into her spine carefully.

The women, shaking, did as ordered. She climbed out the window and on to the ledge. “Please don’t do this.” She tried feebly once more. Hinata growing tired of her pleading roughly hit her back forcing her over the edge and she fell to the earth. Moments later he heard a thud and a scream. He gathered the ties and made his way out of the room, no emotions on his face.

There was no need to report this confirmation; her death would be all over the news in an hour or so.

Hinata refused to look at his phone. He still had work to do. His next stop was to report his step father missing. He made his way out of the building and blended into the crowd that had formed. Hinata quickly moved through the crowd and entered the police station. He was careful to wear his best worried and almost upset face as he reported that he hadn’t heard from his stepfather for over a day and a half. Explaining that he wouldn’t answer his phone and that no one had seen him since Friday morning. The police rang his mother down in Tokyo who didn’t seem overly concerned that he had disappeared. She played into Hinatas plans perfectly, explaining that he had ties to the wrong kind of people and that he was always talking about just packing up and disappearing one day.

Hinata briefly spoke to his mother about the house, since it was still in her name, saying he wanted to stay there.  She tried to convince him to move down with them and put the mess with his stepfather behind him but he wouldn’t even consider that.

Hinata left the station trying hard not to look like he was fleeing. He wandered out down the street pulled out his phone finally. Fingers twitching as he read the text message.

‘Don’t be a moron.’

Hinata smiled. A week ago he would have thought that this meant that the mere thought that Kageyama missed being around him was absurd. Now, however, it meant that something else. Completely different.

Hinata smiled sweetly at the message. Adrenaline flowing through his veins. He bounded down the street, not heading anywhere in particular. Just enjoying the sun on his skin. His hair bouncing softly as he walked.

It had been a while since he had felt this good. It was easy to wear a smile on his face; it was easy to hide his true feelings behind his happy go lucky persona. Hinata liked that it was easy for him; it had saved him from many a conflict. This smile was different. Hinata couldn’t hold it in, it was impossible to trap the feeling he was having.

He wanted nothing more than to keep walking until he ended up at Kageyamas house but fought off the urge to. He still wanted to give him a day or two to truly come to terms with the situation. He sighed. He had automatically walked home without realising. He was tired. The day was weighing heavily on him.

He sat down on his porch, the sun starting to set low in the sky, he knew something needed to change. He couldn’t keep on being two people anymore. He wanted to be the happy, ball of energy that everyone thought he was. He didn’t want to sneak around at all hours of the day anymore. Hinata wanted to be a normal person, stressing about tests and volleyball games not if he had cleaned up a scene well enough so he couldn’t be identified. He had grown accustomed to his double life, but there was something he wanted more than the thrill of feeling someone’s pulse stop and knowing that the he had taken the life force that kept had them alive. He knew now that it was the feel of Kageyamas skin under his touch.

As much as he wanted that, realistically Hinata knew that it would never happen. People didn’t really walk away from his line of work. They just kind of disappeared when they lost their value or strayed from the path. Hinata had dealt with enough of these situations to know that there was no easy escape.

He stretched out and touched his toes. The suns failing rays hitting him softly on the face. It had always been like this but his work was feeling less _satisfying._ The frequency was bothering him too. Two in two days was a huge jump from his normal roster. The most he had ever had in a month was six with a normal month for him being two to three. Something was up and that was not a good thing. It meant that everyone was more on edge than normal and hyper vigilant. Not a good time for Hinata to be seen completely smitten over his best friend but Hinata couldn’t help himself. He had been hiding his feelings for so long, he couldn’t bottle them up anymore.

He dragged himself to his feet and went inside. He locked the door behind him, and yawned. His body ached from the effort of getting his target. He showered and slipped into a pair of light blue boxers and a t-shirt. He had lost track of time while enjoying the feeling of the warm water run down his skin. The house was pitch black when he got out of the bathroom.

Hinata found a packet of instant noodles in the kitchen and made himself dinner. His wet hair hung limply around his face. He struggled to stay awake but managed to make his way into bed.  

Hinata curled around his phone, blankets tucked tightly around his shoulders. His fingers gripped the phone tightly. It vibrated softly.

‘You still alive dork?’

Kageyama was trying to sound casual but Hinata knew that even through text he wasn’t very good at subtly. Hinata hadn’t responded to his message hours earlier. He was worried.

‘Barely. I’m tired. Just curled in bed. You?’

After a minute Hinatas phone buzzed again. ‘Same. Although I’m considerably colder than last night.’

Hinata laughed. ‘You call me dork but you’re the dork Kageyama, if you’re lonely just say so.’

 ‘I am not lonely. I just liked your heat.’

‘That all you like me for huh? Ouch.’

Hinata enjoyed messing with Kageyama. It was too easy to push his buttons and take his words the wrong way. Hinata like to hear him scramble and now was no different. He waited for the reply, fighting off the urge to shut his eyes.

‘No! That’s not what I meant! No!’

‘So you don’t like being close to me then?’

‘Hinata! Stop that you dumbass, you know what I meant. If I didn’t like you we wouldn’t be dating would we? And this would be an entirely different situation.’

Hinatas eyes skimmed over the text. His heart jumped into his throat. He had known that Kageyama had feelings for him, but he didn’t know that Kageyama thought that they were dating. Kageyama thought that he was Hinatas boyfriend. Hinata almost passed out. Colour rose to his cheeks. Before he could respond another text came through.

‘Wait, no, we didn’t talk about that. I didn’t mean to imply anything. I just thought that since we…since I… since what happened… Agh I think I am having an aneurism.’

‘Kageyama. Chill.’ He hastily sent back before get got another jumbled message. ‘But if you are asking then the answer is yes. I would love to be your boyfriend. If you’re ok with that.’

Hinatas face burned. He was almost surprised that it wasn’t glowing in the dark. His head was spinning. Not in a million years had he thought this would happen, his brain was being overloaded. He hugged himself tighter in the blankets.

‘Jeez Hinata, of course I am ok with that. But we need to talk about some other things, in person.’

There was the _but_ that Hinata had been expecting. It was bound to happen but he agreed to hear him out. Hinata yawned.

‘Monday? I’m sorry Kageyama, I’m falling asleep.’

‘Monday. Sweet dreams, boyfriend.’

Hinata nuzzled into his pillow with a grin on his face, soon drifting off to sleep.

He awoke to the sound of his alarm with a jolt. Groggily he got dressed into his uniform and hurried out the door, thinking about seeing Kageyama at their usual meet up place. They normally would meet up where the path from each of their houses met up. Hinata would get off his bike and walk beside Kageyama, walking to school together. Hinata fidgeted, he was eager to see Kageyama. He heard his phone go off. He scrambled through his bag and found it.

It was a text from Kageyama.

‘Gonna be late. Meet you in class.’

Hinatas mood dropped instantly. He gripped his phone; trying to convince himself that this wasn’t a big deal. People were late all the time. He isn’t avoiding you; he thought quickly, he probably overslept. Hinata jumped on his bike and raced to school, trying to not be late himself.

He locked up his bike and headed towards his classroom. He moved like he was in a trance. People said hello to him but he could barely even focus enough to reply. He entered his classroom and slumped quietly into his seat. He buried his head in his arms, leaning on the desk. He risked a glance behind him to Kageyamas still empty seat.

Had he changed his mind? Was he now just trying to figure out how to get away from him? Hinatas stomach churned as the class started. He didn’t even feel like trying to pay attention. His heart felt uneasy and apprehensive. Every noise from the corridor made Hinata flinch in his seat.

Half an hour into the second class of the day, Kageyama burst through the door.

“I’m sorry I’m late.” He blurted, slightly out of breath, bowing to the teacher.

Hinatas head shot up as soon as he heard Kageyamas voice. He beamed at him, still feeling the pit of doubt in his stomach. Kageyama caught Hinatas eye while showing a bit of paper to the teacher. Kageyamas mouth twitched slightly into a small smile.

Hinata felt the blood rush to his face. Kageyama didn’t smile at many things or for many reasons but here he was in front of both of their classmates sending a small smile to Hinata and Hinata alone. It didn’t go unnoticed in the class.

The class whispered as the teacher talked quietly with Kageyama. Hinata heard words like, doctor and recovery, was Kageyama hurt? Had he knocked him that hard on the nose on Saturday? Hinata fought the urge to check if he was alright and managed a quiet “Hey.” As Kageyama took his seat behind him.

Hinata watched the clock for the next hour; waiting intently for lunchtime. The time passed slowly and he couldn’t even remember anything from the morning classes. He wanted to talk to Kageyama. He tried to sit still in his seat.

Kageyama eyed the back of Hinatas head intensely. He hadn’t meant to miss his morning walk with Hinata, in fact it was one of the things that had kept him up late the night before. But his nose had had other plans.

Kageyama had woken up to find himself slightly covered in blood. It was down his shirt and on his sheets. Panic rose in his throat as for a spilt second he thought he had been attacked in his sleep, by what he didn’t know, but feeling no pain his brain connected the dots. He dragged himself to the bathroom and saw in his reflection that his nose had started to bleed again sometime during the early morning. Maybe Hinata had actually broken his nose, it was quite sore. He gingerly touched the top of his nose; he thanked whatever gods he could think of that he hadn’t gotten black eyes from the bump.

He had cleaned himself off and stopped at the hospital on his way to school. He had sat in the accident and emergency ward for a short period of time before being seen to. He explained with burning red cheeks that he had been kissing his friend and that they had accidentally jumped up after being startled and hit his nose. Kageyama freely blushed in front of the doctor who had a chuckle at the thought. The doctor had seemed pretty sure, after his examination of Kageyamas nose, that it was only badly bruised and that it should stop bleeding on its own. Luckily he had also given Kageyama the all-important medical note to get him out of being late to school.

The look Hinata had given him when he arrived in class had made him want to scoop him up, throw him over his shoulder and promptly take him somewhere a little less populated. Having to sit behind Hinata was slowly driving him mad. Having to watch every little move that he made, every little fidget, watching him run his hand through his own hair. Kageyama sighed loudly, earning more attention than he wanted.

 "Am I boring you Kageyama?" The teacher retorted sharply. "If you are going to be late to my class and then sit there sighing all the time maybe you should just stop coming?"

Kageyama shot him his best 'I really don't give a shit look', his eyes narrowing. He didn’t like this attention. He continued to glare at the teacher before catching Hinatas eyes staring back at him carefully. He knew that look; that look meant ‘what you are even doing right now?’ Kageyama lowered his glare and muttered an apology under his breath.  

 "Now that we have his majesty’s approval, let’s get back to the lesson." The teacher quipped, returning to the lesson.

Hinata fully turned to face Kageyama, knowing that the 'majesty' jibe would have hit a nerve. It was too close to 'King' for it not to make Kageyama flinch and Hinata knew it. He saw Kageyama wince and drop his eyes to the desk. Hinata turned back to face the front of the room, surveying his notes sadly. He didn’t want to see that expression. Hinata knew that he had to be careful when he teased Kageyama in the past, sometimes he had made jibes that were too close to reminding Kageyama of his old ways but he could get away with it, complete strangers or, in this instance, teachers could not. They didn’t know him, they couldn’t judge him and yet there were still people on occasion that called Kageyama 'King of the court'. Hinata wanted to say something encouraging to him but he couldn’t. He sat still, eyes drawing daggers at the teacher in front of him and waited for the class to end.

Kageyama tried to keep the emotion off his face and turned to internally throwing insults towards his teacher. It made him feel better. He tried not to look at Hinata, he didn’t want to get told off again for lovesick sighing.

The end of the final class before lunch finally came around with both boys glaring off into space. Hinata jumped to his feet as soon as the class ended, throwing his books roughly into his bag. He spun around and slammed his hands onto Kageyamas desk, ignoring the people staring at the noise.

“Yes?” Kageyama raised an eyebrow as Hinata leaned down close to his face.

Hinata wrinkled his forehead and poked Kageyamas cheek. “Where were you this morning?”

“The hospital. I thought you might have broken my nose.” Kageyama rubbed his nose gently. “But it’s not so you don’t have to feel bad or anything.”

Hinatas shot him a dirty look. “That wasn’t my fault. It was Sugas. I wouldn’t have stopped if he hadn’t have come barging in like he did.”

Realization of what he had just said, hit Hinata hard in the face when he saw faint colour rise in Kageyamas cheeks.

“Oh. Is that so, Hinata?” Kageyama teased quietly.

“S-s-shut up, jerk.” Hinata pulled away from Kageyamas personal space, and folded his arms looking flushed.  

Kageyama smirked. “Can we go _practise_ somewhere?”

The red in Hinatas cheeks immediately vanished at the mention of possible volleyball practise. “You want to practise now? I thought you wanted to have a talk-“

“Dumbass!” Kageyama hissed quickly. “That _is_ what I meant. Jeez Hinata, is there anything up there in your brain or is it just air?” 

Hinata squinted at Kageyama before turning and walking out of the room. Kageyama sat at his desk, surprised that Hinata had just left without a word. He sat stunned for a moment.

“Oi, grumpy. You coming?” Hinata poked his head back into the classroom and called out to Kageyama.

Kageyama grumbled and slung his backpack over his back and followed Hinata who was heading out of the main building to their normal spot where they often practised at lunch. Hinata sat down, leaning against the wall of the building. He gestured to the ground next to him, trying to get Kageyama to sit beside him. Kageyama slid down the wall, and sat close to Hinata. They were alone, sitting in a secluded part of the school.

“So…” Hinata started, his voice uneven. “What did you want to talk about?”

Kageyama sighed again; he made a mental note to try to lay off the sighing for a bit. He seemed to be doing a lot of it lately. He knew he had to get the words out quickly before being close to Hinata made him forget what he wanted to say. He wanted everything out on the table, out in the open so that there was no more confusion.

“Well, I had some time to think things over and I am very no ok with what you do but I can’t stop these feelings I have for you and that scares me because I don’t know what you are capable of and I don’t want to end up devastated by you or to devastate you because I kind think that I maybe like you a little too much, so much more than I originally thought but I just can’t support what you do and I worry that I will lose you and I don’t like the idea of you not being in my life and me not being in yours but the thought of what you do just sends shivers down my spine, it makes me nauseous to see you like that and I don’t want to ever end up as one of your victims or to get caught up in that side of your life, I don’t want to end up in a dangerous situation but if  you can promise me that won’t happen then I will trust you.” Kageyama blurted at a break neck speed, without taking a breath or pausing.

Hinata eyes went wide at how quickly Kageyama spoke. He almost didn’t catch everything that he said.

“Jesus Kageyama. You could just talk like a normal person you know. I’m not going to bite off your head for having realistic worries.”

Kageyama furrowed his forehead and pouted. “Sorry. I just had to get it all out.”

Hinata frowned and processed what Kageyama had said. It was a jumbled confused mix of fear and what appeared to be confusion over his own feelings but it wasn’t as bad as Hinata had thought it was going to be. He hadn’t said he was disgusted or repulsed by him. All things considered Hinata thought what he had said was reasonable but the bit that broke his heart was that Kageyama was afraid of him. Hinata knew to expect this but hearing him say that he was afraid that he would turn into one of his targets meant that he didn’t trust him not to hurt him in more ways than one. This meant that he really didn’t have any clue about the extent of Hinatas feelings towards him. Hinata understood now that Kageyama thought that he liked him but thought that was it. Hinata had already told him that he thought he loved him. He needed to make him believe it now.

“Kageyama,” Hinata started sadly. “You know I could never hurt you. I would rather die myself than cause you any sort of pain. There are parts of me that I can’t stand, that I can’t ever change but there is one thing that I will never want to change or forget and that’s how much you mean to me. I can’t even begin to put it into words. I want to tell you, I need to tell you, to make you understand that I would never do anything to put you at risk.”

Hinata paused, unsure how to put his feelings into words. Now was not a time to use his normal describing words of ‘uwaahh’ and ‘guuu’. He needed to put it simply enough to understand but also to portray the right feelings.

“It’s like I was living in a hurricane, where everything I knew was endlessly being destroyed over and over. I was paralysed, unable to move, unable to live. Trapped at the centre alone with nowhere to go and then you came. No one could touch me, no one could get through the storm to the true me and those that tried just vanished into the storm. Then you forced your way in like there was nothing stopping you at all. Without even trying to you found the part of me that had been trapped alone in pain.  You are the only person who has ever reached the real me. And there are no words to explain how much that means to me.”

Hinata hadn’t noticed but he had started crying silently. Kageyama gently took Hinatas hand in his own and squeezed it softly. Hinata smiled kindly at Kageyama through his tears.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cry.” Hinata wiped his eyes roughly with his sleeve. “You gave me a life when I had none. Without you I would have been be isolated and alone for probably the rest of my life. That doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel.”

Kageyama smiled down at Hinata. “You are making it pretty clear. It’s very unlike you.” He teased softly, reaching over to wipe a tear from Hinatas cheek. Hinatas hand still clutched in his.

“I don’t know if that’s what you wanted to hear or not but that’s a part of how I feel.” Hinata said wretchedly. “I’m sorry if I’m too open about this, I think I don’t really have the option of being reserved with everything that has happened. I’m sorry, Kageyama.”

“Hinata. Please stop for a moment.”

“I really am though; I wish this wasn’t the way things are. I’m so sorry.”

“Shouyou, I’m serious.” Kageyama whispered, knowing that using his name would silence him instantly. The word felt special when Kageyama said it. Nishinoya often called Hinata, ‘Shouyou’ but Kageyama had never said it out loud before and he like the way it felt. Hinatas eyes flew open when he heard his name; he squeezed Kageyamas hand tightly waiting to hear what he was going to say. “If I didn’t feel the same would I be here right now here with you? And even though we went through this accidentally last night, I want to ask you something.”

Hinata nodded, watching Kageyama carefully seeing the hints of a blush again, trying to control the tears still falling from his eyes. Hinata had been holding in a lot of worry over the past couple of days, it was just overflowing and spilling out of him now. The barriers were completely gone.  

“Shouyou, will you go out with me?”

“Yes, Tobio.” Hinata whispered, still feeling lightheaded from hearing Kageyama call his name not once but twice. His heart beat fast in his chest with relief. He knew now that Kageyama still wanted to be with him for certain. Hinata grinned up at Kageyama with the force of a thousand suns.

Kageyama smiled slightly at Hinatas reaction and gently cupped his face; he wiped the last of the tears away with his thumb. “No more tears ok?”

He pulled Hinatas face close to his and gently kissed him. He felt the heat from Hinata again; he had grown to enjoy it. Hinata returned the kiss gently and moved closer to Kageyama. They broke the kiss but still held hands. Hinata lent on Kageyamas shoulder and shut his eyes.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY ABOUT KAGEYAMAS BLURB. The grammar or lack of in that bit drives me insane but I wanted to get across that he just kept talking very quickly, without pausing to breathe or think about what he was saying. So the grammar just disappeared into the air. 
> 
> The chapters are slowly getting longer. I'm trying to fight the urge to turn this fic completely into a fluff piece because I can't help but write cute out of character Kagehina moments. Thank you to all the readers...coming up next heavy flirting (maybe more than flirting also?) and volleyball injuries? Also according to my saved filed, I'm up to around 23,000 words (so there is more coming soon!), I think I might have a bad case of text vomit going on. Kagehina might be ruining my life, oh well it's worth it.
> 
> Thank you all so much for the kudos and comments, I appreciate each and everyone of them :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the HUGE ass hiatus....I totally forgot about this fic... in my defense, I had other things on my mind, I had a car crash at the end of 2014 and then broke my ankle badly in 2015 playing volleyball,, still cant really walk properly ... but uh heres the next chapter? Not sure if anyone is actually still reading this anymore??? 
> 
> This chapter is mostly fluff and cringe worthy goo. I think I might have to rethink where the the next chapter is going, but I will try to remember to update more frequently 
> 
> And as always, a big thank you to everyone who has read, left kudos or a comment, they really make my day :)

 

“This was a very heavy lunch break Kageyama.” Hinata said softly, still resting on his shoulder. “But I’m glad we talked.”

Kageyama nodded and hummed in agreement. He didn’t want to move but he knew they should head back to class. He liked the feeling of Hinatas smaller body next to his. Kageyama felt that he had found the part in his life that he had always felt like he was missing. Like he had been walking around for years with only one leg and now he felt complete.

“We should get back. Lunch is almost over.” Kageyama said.

“Do we have to?” Hinata complained, gripping Kageyamas hand tightly again.

“Well we can’t sit here all afternoon, Hinata.”

Kageyema pulled Hinata to his feet. “Tomorrows the Autumn Equinox, we have the day off right? Let’s go to the beach! It’s still warm enough to swim and we can practise on the beach. It’ll be our first official date. What do you say Kageyama?”

Kageyama thought about it as they walked back to class. He thought about seeing Hinata in his swimming gear, lying on the sand sleeping. He thought about rubbing suntan lotion onto his back and feeling his skin under his hands.

“Uh, sure.” He tried to say casually, as if it was neither a good idea nor a bad one.

“Are you blushing Kageyama?” Hinata stood up on his top toes and smirked at him.

Kageyama narrowed his eyes and looked away from Hinata. “Of course not dumbass.”

“Really?” Hinata got closer to his face. He whispered, “Because you are a marvellous shade of red right now, _Tobio_.”

“Pfft.” Kageyama grumbled and dropped Hinatas hand. He stomped off down the corridor before Hinata could make any more breathy advances on him. It wasn’t fair to call his name like that at school. He couldn’t be feeling what he was feeling going into an afternoon of classes. Hinata would pay.

He heard Hinata laugh from behind him as they entered the classroom. “I think what I suggested really got to you.”

Kageyama sat at his desk and rested his head on top of it. Trying to fight the feelings inside him. The mere thought of Hinata at the beach was sending his mind into overdrive and he had a feeling Hinata had done that on purpose.

Hinata bent over Kageyamas desk and said quietly, so close that Kageyama could feel the warmth of Hinatas breath gently tickling his ear, “To be honest, I’m really looking forward to seeing you swim. All that water sticking to your skin, tasting the salt on your lips; it’s getting me through the day.”

Kageyama briefly gazed up at him and caught a wink; Hinatas face matched his hair colour. Hinata had never been so forward in his entire life. His head was spinning, his blood was pumping. There was a familiar feeling growing in his body. He spun quickly on his toes and slammed down into his seat, staring intently at the desktop. He heard a low chuckle from behind him but dare not look.

There was a buzz in his pocket. By instinct Hinata grabbed out his phone.

‘You are freaking adorable when you are flirting.’

Hinata shuddered. ‘I shouldn’t have done that, this is not going to end well for me.’

Hinata heard Kageyamas phone behind him buzz softly. A moment later he received a reply.

‘Maybe I can make it end well for you?’

Hinata flinched. Eyes turning to the size of saucers. Was Kageyama suggesting what he thought he was?

Hinata shot him a look over his shoulder. There as a strange smirk on Kageyamas face. He looked smug and proud of himself. There was no misinterpreting _that_ look. Hinata smiled weakly at him and nodded very slowly. Before turning his attention to the front of the room.

He needed class to start or he was going to have to disappear to the bathroom for a bit. That look that Kageyama had given him, was burned into his brain. No one had ever looked at him like that before. Hinata felt wanted and desired. It was a new feeling for him and he wanted to show Kageyama it was returned but during maths class after lunch was not the time.

Hinata fumbled his phone onto his lap as the teacher walked in the room to start the lesson. It vibrated on top of his thigh. Hinata glanced down and read the text.

‘I’m going to hold you to that yes you just gave me.’

Hinata froze, his whole body screaming. He had ever felt like this but he liked it. Sending messages heavy with suggestion, and receiving even more suggestive ones were making his heart beat a little too fast. Hinata shut his eyes for a moment and tried to centre himself. He opened his eyes and tried to focus all of his attention on learning what the maths teacher was teaching. He wrote notes and tried to answer questions all in an attempt to forget about his boyfriend who was sitting behind him.

It seemed to work as his heart slowed to a more regular pace and parts of his body stopped aching to be touched. The rest of the afternoon passed quickly for Hinata who had managed to actually pay attention and learn some new things for a change. When he needed to be distracted from a pressing matter, he could actually pay attention in class quiet well. Maybe having Kageyama so close to him in class would pay off with the upcoming exam season, Hinata mused.

His thoughts turned darker as he wondered if he Kageyama could help him deal with the monster inside him. He couldn’t get out of his way of life now. Could Kageyama handle him the way he was for ever? Or was it a matter of time until Hinatas darkness crept onto him and started to suffocate him too?

With that thought Hinata lost track of time and before he knew it, it was already time for the school day to end and club practises to start. He barely noticed the call to stand at the end of the class. Everyone around him stood and Hinata was still deep in thought. Kageyama reached over his desk and shook Hinatas shoulder roughly.

“Earth to moron, stand up.” He grunted.

Hinata snapped out of his trance and jumped to his feet, quickly muttering apologies. The class bowed and slowly the students filtered out. Kageyama and Hinata walked side by side towards the gym.

“What were you thinking about? You didn’t hear the teacher until I shook you.”

“Nothing much, really. Just away with the fairies.” Hinata shrugged.

Kageyama shot him a puzzled look. “Better not be such a space cadet at practise today. If you lose focus I will serve a ball into the back of your head.”

Hinata pouted. “You wouldn’t.”

“You bet your sweet ass I would.”

It had kind of just slipped out. Hinata blushed and made to cover his bottom with his hands, embarrassed. He looked flustered and uneasy.

“Forget, that I said please.” Kageyama shook his head and pushed the boy into the gym roughly. He was letting himself become more relaxed around Hinata by the minute and it made him splurt out any random thought that he was having out loud. He had become so comfortable with Hinatas presence that he didn’t care that what he was saying sounded moronic or sappy. Well perhaps he minded that he was being a tad sappy.

They both stopped at the changing rooms and shared a quick glance. The rest of the team were already inside changing and after the non-events of the afternoon neither was feeling that they could handle being close to each while being half naked.

Hinata swallowed nervously. “After you, Kageyama.”

Kageyama didn’t care if Hinata saw him change. Today should have been no different to any other practise. He had seen Hinata change many times and been able not to act on feelings that he felt but didn’t understand. However when he glanced back at Hinata trailing behind him, he knew that Hinata couldn’t treat this like any other practise. He was fumbling with his school shirt and managed to trap his head in his sleeve resulting in Kageyama having to force the shirt off of him to help. He was sure that his teammates could feel the new tension in the air but no one commented on it. Either they didn’t notice or didn’t want to. Either was fine for Kageyama, he hadn’t really thought about coming out as a couple to them, it struck him as he detangled Hinata that they probably should tell them at some point.

Kageyama didn’t feel embarrassed or ashamed of his relationship, even though it was in the very early stages. Something told him that he wasn’t ever going to be able to let Hinata go not matter what he did. He did wonder if Hinatas line of work would hear about his newly formed relationship if Kageyama did tell everyone about it. He made a mental note to ask Hinata after practise if they had to keep their relationship status to themselves or not. For the time being, he decided he would try to play it cool. Trying to deny the feelings in his bones that yearned to hold Hinata in his arms. It wasn’t going to be an easy practise.

Even more so when Hinata landed, from a practise quick, harshly and fell to the floor. He spread out on the hard gym floor and flinched in pain. He had landed on his ankle in an unstable position and had most likely sprained it. Kageyama had tried not to run to Hinata but still ended up by his side first. He tried to apologise for his toss making Hinata land difficultly but Hinata wouldn’t let him. Suga sprung up and fetched the first aid kit, complete with the salonpas air spray that Hinata liked so much. Although Hinata was not impressed by having it used on him. He tried to sit still as Suga sprayed his ankle gently.

“Give it a quick flex, Hinata.”

Hinata did as told and pain shot up his leg. He flinched again. “Ouch ouch ouch.” He whined.

Suga sprayed his ankle again and began to wrap it carefully with strapping tape. Trying to offer some support to the sore joint.

“Help him up Kageyama, and take him over to the bench. Hinata’s not practising any more today. Put your leg up and rest that ankle.” Daichi ordered, standing behind Suga, eyes watching like a hawk.

Kageyama didn’t need to be told twice. He wrapped an arm around Hinatas back and gently lifted him to his feet. Hinata half hopped, half hobbled with him across the court.

“Thanks.” Hinata grumbled, angry with himself for getting injured and having to watch from the side lines. He had an intense hate for sitting on the bench. It symbolised detachment and separation from the things he loved because he wasn’t good enough to be with them on the court. Hinata hated the bench. Kageyama walked him across the court as everyone else returned to practising. He practically lifted Hinata down on to the bench.

“I’m sor-“

“Don’t you start that again.” Hinata scolded. “I misjudged the jump, these things happen. Don’t get me wrong I’m furious at myself though.”

“Are you going to be alright?”

“Yeah, it already feels a bit better. Thanks for the lift.” Hinata winked. “Go back out there and kill it, okay?”

Odd choice of words, Kageyama thought as he returned to the court. His eyes flitting to Hinata every couple of minutes. He tried to focus on the court, tossing to Asahi and Tsukishima, still bringing his focus to the game but his heart wasn’t in it. Being on the court with Hinata made the game more interesting. He tried harder. Repeated his serves and practised receiving with more vigour than he usually did, trying to make up for the void. A bead of sweat rolled down his spine as practise came to an end. Everyone gathered around Hinata and had a quick debrief meeting.

As everyone dispersed Suga crouched down to check on Hinatas ankle, Kageyama hovering close to Hinatas side. It hadn’t swollen and Hinata could move it up and down tentatively.

“Hmm.” Suga wondered, holding Hinatas ankle. “Does it hurt much now? It hasn’t swollen much but it might flare up later tonight.”

Hinata put his foot on the floor and flexed it slowly. “I think it feels ok now, the strapping is helping a lot.”

Hinata tried to stand up and crumpled half away through, Kageyama instinctively grabbed Hinatas waist in one fluid motion and stopping him from falling over. He lifted him to his feet and supported Hinatas weight. Hinatas arm moved by itself to Kageyamas shoulder and he steadied himself on one foot while holding his right foot just above the floor.

Suga had reacted too slow and was mid panic about him potentially hitting the floor. He breathed out a sigh of relief. “Nice save Kageyama.”   

Hinata beamed up at him. “You saved me! Thank you Kageyama.”

Kageyama muttered that it was nothing, hoping Hinata didn’t mind being close to his sweaty body.

Daichi walked over to them and looked down at Hinata. “How are you going to get home with that ankle? You can’t even stand without grabbing onto Kageyama.”

Hinata gently pushed himself away from Kageyama, determined to not look weak and helpless. Releasing the death grip he had on Kageyamas shoulder he balanced himself upright. “I’m totally fine. I’ll just bike home like normal.”

He wobbled slightly, failing his arms, standing on one foot. All three pairs of eyes sent him a disapproving look. He went to place his foot back on the floor and took a confident step forward. Yet again Kageyamas lightning reflexes prevented Hinata falling face first onto the floor. He scooped him up and threw him over his shoulder. Hinatas small frame bending with ease over his shoulder. Hinata beat Kageyamas lower back with his fists in mock rage.

“Let me down!” He wailed, trying not to let the embarrassment show and failing. “I can walk. I can play. I am fine. Let me down, you jerk!”

“It’s okay Captain, I’ll ride his bike home and he can just sit on the back.” Kageyama told Daichi and Suga calmly, while Hinata hit his back like a drum and cried for his release. Kageyama struggled to keep him still.

“Oi! Stop wriggling you hyperactive child. You’re going to hurt my shoulder.” Kageyama barked at Hinata. He felt the wriggling cease. It made holding him there easier.

“You ok with doing that Kageyama?” Daichi asked, knowing if he actually minded Kageyama would have said so. “Alright, you get Hinata home and make sure he rests his foot before you leave. Can’t have our decoy unable to play.”

Suga walked around behind Kageyama and bent down to face Hinata. “Hear that Hinata? Captains orders.”

Hinata grumbled loudly, he was unhappy that he was in this position in public. If no one else was around Hinata wouldn’t have minded being so close to Kageyama.

“Fine! Fine. I will rest. I don’t need a babysitter.”

“There’s no way I believe that you will rest. I just know you will try to play volleyball tonight after you’re left alone at home and end up hurting yourself more.” Daichi lectured, he stared Kageyama in the eye. His face serious. “If he is worse on Wednesday I’m blaming you.”

“What!?! I can’t make him sit still when I’m not there. You can’t rope me into this Captain.”

Daichi turned to walk away and get changed. “I’m blaming you.”   He repeated before he left.

Kageyama hissed at Hinata. “If you get me in trouble with Daichi I will never toss to you again. So you better not try to practise tonight or tomorrow.”

“I’m not promising anything.” Hinata spat back at him, he paused and added in a small voice, “But ok. I will rest.”

Suga laughed at them both watching Kageyama walk slowly to the changing room. He awkwardly bent down, with Hinata still balanced on his right shoulder, to pick up their school bags. Another day where they went home in their sports uniforms. It was almost becoming a tradition.

They left the gym and started to head to bike racks.

“Are you going to put me down anytime soon? I can just limp if you help me.” Hinata asked eager to not have the entire school see him bent over Kageyamas shoulders.

“No.” Was all the response he got. Kageyama easily found Hinatas bike, when you saw a particular person’s bike at least twice a day it became very easy to spot in amongst many others.

“You want down now or maybe well ride home like this?” Kageyama teased Hinata before lifting him off his shoulder carefully. He held out his arm so Hinata could balance on his left foot only. He looked at Hinata with a worried look on his face. Hinatas heart melted.

“Are you actually okay? I was really worried about you but I didn’t want to do anything to make anyone suspicious.” He said softly, his eyes meeting Hinatas.

Hinata smiled back at him earnestly. “I am, it’s just a little sprain.”

Kageyama lifted one leg over Hinatas bike and sat down. He put their backpacks in the front basket.

“I’ll take you home and look after you for a bit. Gotta have you alright for our beach trip, right?”

Hinatas eyes perked up. He had forgotten about the beach. Then he remembered the entire afternoon and what Kageyama had said in his message. Kageyama was holding his hand gently as the blush rose on Hinatas face.

“Come on space cadet, get on the bike. Stop daydreaming.”

Hinata half hopped, half jumped onto the back of the bike. Grabbing Kageyamas shirt roughly to keep himself upright. He wanted to wrap his arms around his waist and snuggle into his back, but Hinata knew better. He held onto Kageyamas shoulders tightly.

“Ready go to? Hold on, I don’t want you falling off ok?” Kageyama began to pedal the bike slowly out of the school grounds. He heard snickering behind him and saw Nishinoya and Tanaka walking home together. Tanaka whistled suggestively at them and Kageyama pulled the middle finger at them before speeding off down the footpath.

“I’m sorry you have to do this Kageyama.”

“It’s honestly no problem. This way I know you will get home safely-“

Kageyama had to stop himself. He was going to say something about avoiding suspicious people, momentarily forgetting that Hinata was the main thing to be afraid of in this town. He never thought it would slip his mind that Hinata killed people and yet it had. His feelings were overpowering the notion of Hinatas secret life. Kageyama wondered if that was a good thing.

Feeling hands grip his shoulders tightly snapped him out of his thoughts. He was rather concerned about Hinatas ankle. It hadn’t been a good fall. It would heal, hopefully with not much time.

The bike ride to Hinatas was mostly silent. Each boy just enjoying the ride, enjoying the faint breeze that blew through both of them. Kageyama pulled up to Hinatas house and stopped the bike by the front porch. He put his feet on the ground and reached behind him to grab Hinatas hand. He tried to help him off the bike first. Hinata stood on one foot until Kageyama had gathered up their bags and then grabbed Hinatas waist again. Kageyama helped him hop up to the door carefully.

“My keys are in my uniform pants pocket in my bag. You should be able to find then.” Hinata told Kageyama. He ruffled through Hinatas school bag and found his keys. He unlocked the door and then slowly walked inside.

Kageyama crouched down slowly and went to grab Hinatas shoes off his feet. Hinata shook his head furiously and tried to shoo him away.

“I can do it. You don’t have to.” Hinata exclaimed quickly, trying to balance himself against the walk.

“Just let me look after you. Sit down a sec.” Kageyama asked in gentle voice. Hinata sat down on one of the steps and held out his sore foot to Kageyama. Kageyama carefully untied Hinatas gym shoes and tried to slide the shoe off as smoothly as he could. He looked up at Hinata who refused to make eye contact with him. He pulled the other shoe off quickly and then took off his own.

He bent down and picked up Hinata, the same way that he had picked up Kageyama a few days earlier. Kageyama held him, bridal style, close to his chest. Hinata automatically nuzzling his head into Kageyamas neck. He felt Hinatas warm breath against his skin. Heard Hinatas muffled grunts of embarrassment. Felt Hinatas warmth against his body.

“Where am I taking you?”

Hinata hadn’t thought about it, but it made sense to go straight to his bedroom so he wouldn’t have to crawl upstairs by himself later. He couldn’t bring himself to say it though. The implication of those words were too much for him to handle. He hid behind his hands and shook his head.

Kageyama tapped his foot impatiently. “Well? Don’t hide behind your hands; I can’t stand here holding you all night. Where do you want me to take you?”

Hinata heard the irritation rise in Kageyamas voice. He wasn’t making this easy. He took a deep breath.

 “My bedroom.” Hinata stammered still hiding behind his hands. 

Hinata immediately felt the grip around his body loosen. For a split second he thought Kageyama was going to drop him out of shock. Hinata peeked out over his finger tips and gazed up at Kageyama. Kageyamas mouth was slightly agape and his eyes were wide. He looked stunned. Hinata felt his arms tighten around him as Kageyama regained his compose.

“P-Pardon?” Kageyama stuttered.

“Take me to my bedroom. Please.” Hinata gulped. “I won’t be able to get up there by myself.” He added quickly, trying to make it clear he wasn’t implying the wrong information.

Since when did Kageyama stutter? Hinata wondered. He was always so in control, that pure look of surprise on his face was not something Hinata saw very often.

“Oh of course, right.” Kageyama stated.

He made his way upstairs. “I think we should probably not carry each other up to your bedroom for a bit.”

“Is it that bad?” Hinata joked. “I like when you hold me. It can’t that bad for you?”

Kageyama laughed. “I suppose there are worse things in the world than holding you close to me.”

He kicked open the bedroom door carefully and crossed the room. He placed Hinata down on top of his bed and sat next to him. The tension made Kageyamas heart beat fast. Hinata swung his legs on to his bed and inspected his ankle. He poked at the strapping making sure it was supporting his ankle still. Hinata wiggled his foot tentatively and winced slightly.

“Hey! None of that. I will get in trouble with Daichi. Rest your foot.” Kageyama ordered, slapping Hinatas hand away tenderly. He stood up, grabbed Hinatas pillows and propped Hinata up against his headboard.

“Sorry, I thought it felt better.” Hinata wiggled carefully against the pillows, making himself more comfortable.

“Is there anything I can get you so you won’t get up?”

“My phone and laptop should keep me entertained until I sleep I suppose. I could always do some homework if I get desperate.” He locked eyes with Kageyama who was trying to keep a straight face. Hinata continued, “As if.” He chuckled. Kageyama cracked a smile while grabbing Hinatas computer from the dresser on the other side of the room.

“You doing homework? Come on. That’d never happen.” Kageyama chuffed as he handed the laptop over.

Hinata pouted, putting the laptop on the bed next to him, the cord trailing down the bed. “Hey! I do homework…sometimes. Just not as frequently as it is given out.”

“Not even going to touch that comment. Is your phone in your bag?”

“Yeah. Should be.”

 “Are you hungry? Do you want something brought up stairs?”

Hinata thought about it. “Actually some food sounds amazing. There’s leftover Chinese takeaways in the fridge. We can split it if you’re hungry too?”

Kageyama bent down and kissed Hinatas forehead. “I’ll be back soon. Don’t move.” He didn’t look back but he knew Hinata would have a goofy grin on his face. He shook his head at his own actions. Since when did he kiss foreheads so much? In fact when did he become so affectionate?

Kageyama thought about the changes in his own behaviour, never in a million years did he ever think he would be acting the way he had been around Hinata. He was getting less angry by the day. That stupid ball of joy was changing him with every word, every glance, every touch. The angry, selfish monster was melting away due to constant exposure to the young murderer. How that logic worked was beyond him but he knew Hinata would always be a special case. It wasn’t like he was waiting on Tsukishima.

This was Hinata. This was his Hinata.

There was something the clicked inside him, as if he had been living in the dark and someone had finally found the light switch, dragging his existence into the light. He felt the desire protect Hinata even though he was perfectly capable of protecting himself. He wanted to fight Hinatas darkness, to help him keep it at bay. Kageyama was very unhappy with the idea of Hinata suffering. He huffed at the thought.     

Kageyama walked downstairs and found Hinatas school bag where he had left it by the front door. He wandered through Hinatas house, trying to avoid the few family photographs that hung in the hallway and living room. It was a grim reminder of something Kageyama was trying desperately to deny even existed.

Hinatas kitchen was pretty bare for kitchen that two people supposedly used, Kageyama noted as he opened the fridge. He rummaged around the kitchen draws and found two pairs of chopsticks. By the time he got back upstairs Hinata had turned on the laptop and was playing some music softly through it. It was melodic and peaceful.

Hinata shuffled over on his bed and patted the spot next to him. Kageyama sat down next to him and handed him his phone. Hinata immediately opened the camera app and pulled Kageyama close to him.

“I’m going to send Daichi a pic so he knows that you are making me rest so you won’t get kicked of the team by him on Wednesday in case I hurt myself when you’re not here.”

Kageyama pulled a face, awkwardly holding the leftover Chinese carton. Hinata of course beamed at the phone as it went click. He quickly sent the message and then Kageyamas phone vibrated in his pocket. He sighed. Guessing Hinata had sent the picture to the entire team.

“Photo time over now?”  Hinata nodded.

The music wafted over Kageyama. It was light and upbeat. He really enjoyed musical pieces and this one suited his tastes perfectly. It was the perfect tone to ignore the almost constant vibrating coming from his pocket. He knew his teammates were making fun of him but he didn’t care. The smile on Hinatas face was the only thing that Kageyama was focused on. Hinata was chuckling as his own phone went off.

“I imagine you got that too?”

Kageyama nodded.

“I might have accidentally sent it to the team on purpose.”

Kageyama nodded again absentmindedly, watching the smile on Hinatas face. “Wait what?” Kageyamas brain caught up with his ears. “You did that on purpose?”

“Well, I can’t parade you around as my boyfriend and show you off like I want to, so this was one of the only opportunities that I’ll have to spread a photo of us together without raising too much suspicion.”

Kageyama shut his eyes in frustration. “We always spend time together. It’s not rare for us to be photographed together.”

“But it means something to me.”

Kageyama groaned.

Hinatas smile vanished. “Is it that bad that we have a photo of us together?”

“No, you idiot. Don’t the wrong idea.” Kageyama stammered. “It’s just, I’d rather our first photo be one where I can smile in it. Not where I am holding noodles and not you.”

Hinata bit his lip, trying very hard not to tease Kageyama for his notoriously terrifying forced smile. “We could take one just for us?”

“I’d like that.”

Hinata put his arm around Kageyamas back and pulled him closer, his hand ending up on Kagyeamas hip. Their faces close. Hinata held out his phone, his finger hovering over the camera button. Kageyama put his arm around Hinatas shoulders and lent down to Hinatas level. He tried not to blush as they assumed a cheesy pose. The things he did for Hinata, he groaned.

“Ready?”

Kageyama nodded and smiled at Hinata, his eyes looking towards him and not the camera. He heard a snap and let his face fall back to a normal state. Hinata flashed the photo at him, after checking it himself.

“You weren’t looking at the camera.” He puffed, silently noticing the peaceful smile on Kageyamas face.

“No, I was looking at the thing that makes me smile. Cameras don’t make me smile, you do.” Kageyama told the shorter boy in a lecturing voice.

Hinata hit him softly on his shoulder. “Stop being so adorable and give me the Chinese. I’m starving.”

“Fuck off. I am not _adorable_.” Kageyama snorted irritably making Hinata laugh.

They sat and talked while sharing the cold Chinese food. Just enjoying each other’s company. It was a serene moment that both would remember fondly. Hinata pulled the duvet up over his legs as the sun began to set in the sky, a chill creeping up his skin. He wiggled from his sitting position down the bed, flinching as he moved his sore ankle. Clutching the duvet around his body he put his head on Kageyamas lap and yawned.

“You can’t be tired. You didn’t even practice much today. It’s me who should be yawning like that. After practicing and carrying you around all afternoon, you don’t have the right to yawn.” He grumbled down at Hinata but didn’t ask him to move. His fingers ached to touch Hinatas hair.

“Cut me some slack. I can’t even stand on my own. Let me enjoy lying like this, you meanie.” Hinata said weakly. “It’s getting pretty dark out. Are you staying again?”

“I should probably go home. I don’t have any clothes apart from my uniform. I need a shower.” Kageyama stated in a monotone. “Also my swimming gear isn’t here.”

If I stay, he thought quickly, I don’t know if I can control myself or if I would want to. Kageyama wanted to stay but he already felt like they were rushing things.

“Oh. Okay.” Hinata said slightly dejected. “I just thought that…”

Hinata trailed off, unsure if he wanted to provoke Kageyama. He decided against it. “Never mind. You are still keen for the beach? I hope I can stand on my ankle.”

“If you can’t we’ll do something else, like watch a movie or whatever.”  Kageyama lifted Hinatas head off of his lap lightly. He slid off the bed and watched Hinata curl around his pillow. “Are you going to be alright by yourself? I don’t want to leave you helpless.”

“I’ll be fine. I don’t plan on moving, but company would have been nice…”

Kageyamas stomach flipped. That tone. It cried out for him. He tried to stand by his resolve. Hinata was like a drug to him and he had a sneaky feeling that Hinata himself knew that.

“Don’t you dare try to guilt me into staying.” Kageyama folded his arms gruffly and sighed. “How about I bring a change of clothes tomorrow and then I stay with you then?” He compromised, hoping Hinata would stop using that tone of voice soon.

“I’d like that.” Hinata hid his face behind the blanket. “I like sleeping next to you; I _really_ like waking up with you next to me.”

Kageyama crouched down and pulled the blankets down, revealing a red faced Hinata. He caressed Hinatas cheeks softly before kissing him passionately. Hinata returned the kiss with the same passion, his hands automatically pulling Kageyama back down to the bed. Hinata hesitantly started to explore Kageyamas mouth with his tongue. He liked the way Kageyama tasted. A taste of him sent Hinatas body into overdrive. It was like a shot of pure adrenaline to his heart.   

“I like being able to do that.” Kageyama smirked at him. “And look forward to doing it more too.”

“Me too.” Hinata whispered happily.

Kageyama kissed his forehead and ruffled his hair. He couldn’t resist touching Hinatas hair any longer. It was so soft and always looked slightly different as if it had a mind of its own.

“I really should get going. Rest your leg. Text me if you need anything okay?”

“Yes yes. I know. Rest.”

“Promise me you will.”

“I promise.”

“Sweet dreams, Shouyou.” Kageyama flashed him a small smile as he left the room.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An update that didn't take a year to do, shock! The inspiration fairy struck. FIRST OFF, the comments, oh my I'm dying. Thank you all so much. I am terrible at replying but honest to god they are the best part of writing this. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!! I really appreciate it!
> 
> I really hope you all like this :) please enjoy~

 

Kageyama heard a muffled yell along the lines of ‘you can’t say that and leave! You jerk’ from the other side of the door which was followed by a quiet laugh as he made his way downstairs with a silly grin on his face. He grabbed his bag and looked out the windows into the darkness as he put on his shoes. Out of habit he wondered if it was safe out there. He caught himself and remembered why he would be fine. Hinata was the main reason people were periodically disappearing, there was no reason to fear the night. But still as Kageyama stepped out into the night he felt apprehensive. It had been hammered into him for so long that this was not a safe neighbourhood once darkness fell.

He locked Hinatas door before shutting it. He walked down the street and headed off in the direction of his house. Not a soul was out. It was still early but the autumn chill was in the air.

Kageyama nearly jumped out of his skin as his phone vibrated against his leg. He swore under his breath, increasing his pace. He skimmed quickly over the previously ignored messages from his teammates and came to the most recent one.

Of course it’s from Hinata. He mused.

‘Text me when you get home ok. I won’t be able to sleep until you are home safe.’

Kageyama flicked a quick reply back and continued on his way. The cool air nipping at his face.

He wondered if Hinatas ankle would be alright for the beach tomorrow. It hadn’t seemed too bad; there was no immediately bruising or much swelling. He knew Hinata wouldn’t rest it; there was no way that someone with as much energy as Hinata would be able to sit still for too long. But then again, the things Kageyama had learned about Hinata in the past week made him question that thought. Maybe he could control himself long enough to let his sore limb heal. He hadn’t looked like he would be moving anytime soon when Kageyama had left.

He walked up to his front door and rummaged around in his school bag for his house keys. Kageyama sent Hinata a text as he unlocked the door, letting him know he had arrived safely. The house was of course empty and cold. It felt lifeless inside it. Kageyama didn’t have the slightest clue where his mother was. It was not a new feeling for him. His house felt foreign now that he knew how a happy house could feel. Admittedly Hinatas house had a morose feel to it but that was fading away. Hinatas house was warm and vibrant with his life. Kageyamas’ was cold and gloomy with lack of life. The darkness hung in the air.

He threw his bag onto his bed and headed for a shower. He stopped to inspect his nose in the mirror before showering. The empty panic that had engulfed him the last time he checked his nose had left him. He was slowly coming to terms with his situation and feelings. The shock had been severe but it was passing. His heart didn’t jump into his throat in horror when he thought about how he felt about Hinata as often.

The water poured down his face and he smiled at the ceiling. It was a drastic change. In the last week he had experienced a whole range of emotions. From realizing his true feelings to being a complete distraught mess to smiling about nothing. Perhaps the cycle of disillusion that he was falling into had put him in deep state of shock so he was numb or perhaps a bright, bubbly, dangerous ginger nut was showing him how pointless it was to worry about darker parts of humanity. 

Kageyama smiled at his reflection.

His life had always been lonesome and bleak before he met Hinata, and one way or a nothing he was being dragged out into the uncharted territory of actually having a reason to smile. Kageyama could almost be a professional at fake smiles, however the one on his face staring hopefully back at him was the first genuine smile he had seen on his own face in a long time. Be it kicking or screaming, Kageyama had someone who was pulling happiness out of him, out from a place he didn’t know he had inside him.

After what he had said at lunch today, Kageyama knew that Hinata felt the same way.

He left the shower and the cool air hissed softly against his warm skin. Kageyama dressed himself and dried off his hair. He slid into his cold bed, lying on his back, mentally cursing himself for leaving Hinata and coming home. It was for the best he reasoned with himself. He couldn’t get too attached; he didn’t want to put his own life or Hinatas at risk by accidentally being to forward in public. He set an alarm on his phone and fell into a deep sleep, his legs spread out to the edges of the bed like starfish. His body, tired from practise, slowly gave up and he drifted to a deep sleep.

Hinata had curled tightly into a ball when Kageyama had left his room. He had to control himself when he had said his first name. Hinata liked it a lot when Kageyama said his name. It made him feel fuzzy and flushed. He also liked that he was saying it often. One night he was going to make Kageyama moan his name, he thought seductively. His face burned at the thought of what he wanted to do to Kageyama and he buried himself in his blankets.  

“Not now.” He muttered hitting his head with his hand. “Sleep, rest. See him at the beach.”

He shut his eyes in the dark and tried to rest. A moment later his phone buzzed softly. Hinata grabbed his phone expectantly. He read the message and his mood dropped. There was another job scheduled for this week. They had given him a window for the hit, leaving it up to him, of somewhere between today and the next Monday.

Three in two weeks? Hinata thought frantically. It was too many. There were too many. This is not the way things were supposed to go. He was supposed to have some downtime after the rush job on Saturday, he thought he would have at least another month up his sleeve before he had to get his next target. What was going on? Someone was had to be leaking serious information for the hit rate to be so high. His fingers twitched nervously. They had to be weeding out the traitors in their inner circles for this to be happening. Hinata knew that by asking him for so many hits they were risking detection. There were many factors to consider for him and the increasing rate was making him uncomfortable. He knew his bosses would understand his concern but they wouldn’t have given him these jobs unless it was necessary. It was strange to have orders in advance like this but it gave Hinata a chance to plan it out thoroughly.

He wondered why now. Why it was happening now but Hinata knew better than to ask questions. He sighed. This was going to make things with Kageyama more stressful than he wanted. Hinata just wanted to enjoy the new relationship. To enjoy being a normal person in love, to feel things he hadn’t ever felt before but it seemed his other life was determined to make that a challenge. It would test Kageyama.

Hinata pondered, should he tell him that he had another job? Was that the kind of thing that you would share with your boyfriend? He really didn’t know. He didn’t really think Kageyama would want to know and maybe since Hinata was determined to not let that side of him affect Kageyama it was best to keep them both separate. His phone buzzed again, this time it was Kageyama telling him he got home safely. He worried about Kageyama. Hinata knew that he wasn’t the worst thing out here combing the night.

Knowing Kageyama was safe put Hinatas mind at ease and he slipped off into sleep soon after.

Hinata woke as the suns weak rays crept into his room. He yawned and stretched out in his bed. He sleepily dragged himself out of bed and trudged down the hall to the bathroom. He yawned at his reflection and ruffled his hair, trying to make it a little more presentable. It took him a few moments to realise that he had walked without being in pain.

“Uwah!” He hopped frantically onto his left foot scared his right would give out. “Careful, careful.”

He slowly placed it back on the ground and tested his weight. It didn’t feel completely right but there was no immediate pain. It seemed to be ok aside from some decent swelling, if he didn’t push it too much today then it should heal quickly. Hinata resisted the urge to dance. He could move again. He cautiously stripped off his clothes and had a quick shower.

He wrapped a towel around his waist and walked slowly back to his room. He threw on a loose fitting t shirt and some shorts. While drying his hair he heard the doorbell. He hobbled cautiously down the stairs, not wanting to strain his weak ankle. He opened the door and found a casually dressed Kageyama looking down at him. A bag slung across each shoulder, wearing sunglasses.

“Morning.” He said, looking at Hinata over the top of his sunglasses.  “How’s the ankle? You never responded to my texts so I came over to check on you.”

“Texts?” Hinata asked puzzled, flicking a wet strand of hair out of his eyes.

“I sent like four...” He trailed off noticing Hinatas damp hair. Kageyama eyed Hinatas droopy hair slowly. Parts were already spiking up, drying off quickly. Hinata started to explain he had just been in the shower when Kageyama pushed him inside the house and closed the door quickly. His hands reached out for Hinata as if to shake him.

“What’re you-? Be careful! My ankle-“ Hinata tried to say, flustered by Kageyamas demeanour, taking a step backwards. Kageyama dropped the bags he was carrying and stepped towards Hinata.

“Kageyama, what are you doing? You look like you’re about to rob me.” Hinata said confused as Kageyamas extended arms grasped his shoulders. He bent down so he was eye level with Hinata.

“Just hold still Hinata.”

Hinata frowned as he became face to face with a pair of sunglasses. He could see his own reflection staring back at him looking disgruntled. Kageyama stared at him for a moment before releasing him. He grabbed the smaller bag and slung it over his shoulder.

“To the beach then?” He asked like nothing had happened.

“Eh? What was that all about?”

Kageyama turned away from him and said, “It’s nothing. You ok to be going out on your foot?”

“No! Tell me.” Hinata whined and pulled on Kageyamas shirt. “Why did you do that?”

Kageyamas voice caught in his throat. Hinata whining wasn’t anything new, but at least now Kageyama knew why it flustered him so much. “You can’t laugh ok? Seriously if you do I might never talk to you again.”

Hinata nodded furiously.

“I just kinda missed being around you. My house feels so dead. It’s like by being there I forget what it is like to be around you and I just needed a little reminder how just by being near you makes me feel better. I want to be able to remember what your face looks like when I’m not around you so I can cling to that happy thought. I thought ‘fresh-out-of-the-shower-Hinata’ is a good version of you to burn into my brain.” He straightened his sunglasses. “And you look really cute when you don’t know what I’m doing. You scrunch your nose when you are confused.”

“You’re so weird.” Hinata released Kageyamas shirt. “You can keep being weird. It makes me feel like I’m less weird.”

Kageyama ruffled his hair roughly. “Never being nice to you again now.”

“Kageyamaaaaa.” Hinata moaned. “Nooooo.”

Kageyama was too tired to deal with a whingey Hinata, it was too early in the morning. He swiftly planted a kiss on Hinatas lips, the smell of Hinatas shampoo gently wafting around him.

“Get your stuff or we’ll never get to the beach.” Kageyama murmured his face lingered close to Hinatas.

“I like it when you do that.” Hinata said with a smile on his face, rocking backwards and forwards on the balls of his feet; hands behind his back.

“When I shut you up?”

Hinata nodded and started to climb the stairs.

“Where should I leave my other bag?” Kageyama called out to him.

“You can just dump it in my room if you want?”

Kageyama picked up the larger bag and followed his boyfriend upstairs. He had awoken early and quickly packed an overnight bag. He threw in a couple of school shirts and a couple of different outfits. He wasn’t going to push staying at Hinatas but if he had his way he might never leave his house again. In his smaller bag he packed his swimming shorts and a towel. He assumed Hinata would bring a volleyball with him. After receiving no reply from Hinata he had decided to just turn up at his house. It was a clear day, the temperature would be high. Perfect weather for a relaxing day at the beach.

Hinata was crouched over a draw, hunting for something. He didn’t look up. “Just drop it on the floor somewhere. Ah! There they are.” He pulled out a pair of swimming shorts. They were a dark blue colour, close to black with a few stars randomly placed near bottom on the shorts. He held them up triumphantly then shoved them into his satchel.

“What else? What else?” He asked Kageyama.

“A towel?”

“Of course.” Hinata walked carefully out of the room and returned a moment later with a towel and a bottle of sunscreen. Kageyama raised an eyebrow. Sunscreen? Hinata had fair skin so it made sense but he didn’t really want to go down the cliché path of rubbing sunscreen on his back even though he knew that he would enjoy every moment of it. Soon he was packed and they were leaving the house.

“So the train?”

“It’s the easiest way to get there.”

“Do you want to stop anywhere and get some food to take with us? It’ll be after lunch by the time we get there?”

They stopped at convenient store next to the station, picking up some rice balls and drinks. Kageyama eyed the vending machine outside while Hinata picked out some snacks inside. He grunted at the machine, it was out of his favourite.

They boarded the train and were soon heading off to the beach. Hinata sat on his knees on the seat, sitting opposite Kageyama, and looked out the window. He liked to watch the passing scenery. He pointed out random things to Kageyama as they sped past.

“You’re acting like you’ve never seen a cow before.” Kageyama retorted at Hinatas expression when they passed a farm.

Hinata pouted at him. “I have, but when do we ever see cows roaming around town?”

Kageyama rolled his eyes behind the sunglasses, not that Hinata could tell.

It was a short trip through the countryside to the beach. Hinata jumped up before the stop and dragged Kageyama down towards the doors.  He continued to drag him quickly through the station. Reluctant to let go of his hand, but he did as they left the station.

“Kageyama. Are we being followed?” Hinata casually asked.

A few hundred metres behind them were a group of four girls that Hinata had seen follow them onto the train. He had kept a close eye on them as he looked out of the trains windows and they had continued to act strangely even after leaving the train. His senses couldn’t just be turned off, everyone was a danger to him and his life with one exception.

“Hmm? What?” Kageyama said taking off his sunglasses and looking around.

“Don’t do that, they’ll see you!” Hinata hissed; he pulled Kageyama down the street. “Don’t acknowledge them you idiot.”

“You mean those girls? They’re harmless Hinata.”

“Trust me on this one, Kageyama.” Hinata said warningly, releasing Kageyama.

Kageyama put his sunglasses on top of his head. “What on earth are you talking about?” He glanced over his shoulder quickly. They looked around the same age as he was. Kageyama thought they looked like normal teenage girls. “They’re just girls.”

“Stop looking Kageyama.” Hinata barked harshly at him. “You don’t want them to come over to us. Keep walking.”

Hinata had caught a better look and knew why his body was reacting like it was being threatened. He knew two of the girls and not in a friendly way. One was his new target that he just received the night before and the other was not someone he wanted to have to face again. Lucky was not on Hinatas side today.

“You’re being even more peculiar than normal today, Hinata.”

“Do you want me to say why? I am trying to keep you out of this.” Hinata said angrily. He didn’t want Kageyama to get into this mess with him. He would never forgive himself if anything happened to Kageyama because of him. “Please, just take my word for it.” Hinata begged. “Let’s just get to the beach.”

They walked a bit faster down the road towards the beach in silence. Tension in the air.

“Sorry.” Hinata grumbled as they walked onto the golden sand. “I didn’t mean to ruin today.”

“It’s ok.” Kageyama said gruffly trying to not let show that the mood of the day had indeed shifted.

They found a spot down by the shore and spread out their towels on the sand. Hinata sat down, and then stretched out on the sand laying on his back. He rested an arm over his eyes and felt the sun beat down on his skin.

Kageyama sat down next to him and looked out over the ocean. It was flat, not a breath of wind, with a few people scattered in it near the shore. Kageyama liked the sea. It was harsh and unforgiving, but could be beautiful and serene at the same time.

“Who were they?” Kageyamas curiosity got the better of him. He knew he shouldn’t ask but the way that Hinata had reacted meant that something was up.

“I recognised two of them. One is a girl that I’ve come across on a job before.” Hinata said vaguely.

“And the other?” Kageyama couldn’t resist. He wanted to know. Hinata was doing his best to leave out important information which only made Kageyama want to know more.

Hinata sighed sitting up; he looked Kageyama in the eye. “I am not going to tell you. You do not want to know.”

“Oh.” He said. Unsure if he should press the matter. “You can talk to me Hinata. Let me help you bear this burden.”

Hinata smiled sadly. “I can’t. I can’t do that to you.”

“No, don’t do that. Don’t smile like that. I don’t want to see you smile like you think you won’t get a chance to ever again. Something’s bothering you. I noticed it this morning, something about you felt off. Your energy was flat.”

Hinata tried not to smile, Kageyama was unsurprisingly perceptive as usual. Hinata was worried. Not so much about this new relationship he found himself in, but about the current situation at work. To have others walking around in his territory out in plain sight in the daylight, was a huge warning flag.

“Something’s going on and I don’t know what. Everything’s being rushed. Things are happening more than normal; more than they should be. There are people in my town that shouldn’t be here and know that they shouldn’t be here. There is a dangerous, ominous cloud hanging over this city.”

Kageyama barely muffled a snort. Hinata was being serious but the words sounded absurd. “Hinata, are you safe? Can I help you? I’m not going to drop this, so just tell me.”

“I’ve already said too much. You know too much as is, Kageyama. You need to stop. The more you know the more danger you are in.”

“I think I past the point where I knew too much days ago. You need someone to talk to, please let me be that person. I already know the big bits.” Kageyama had shuffled closer to him. His sunglasses still on his head gleamed in the sunlight. “Please, Hinata.”

Hinata wrinkled his forehead seriously. He looked over at Kageyama and saw a look he knew very well. It was Kageyamas determined face; Hinata had seen it many times on the court. It meant that there was no stopping him from getting his way, no way that he would let this conversation end without getting what he wanted.

“Part of what I am is not knowing anything. It keeps me safer that way. I just get a name and photo and sometimes a time or place. It’s never been like this though; someone must be threatening my _associates’_ areas.”

Hinata looked out over the beach, eyes scanning for that familiar face. He didn’t find her. “Can I tell you something? That no one apart from you can ever hear.”

“Goes without saying moron. I’m not exactly a gossip queen besides you’re the only one I really talk to.”

Hinata rolled his eyes and then looked down at his hands. He folded them in his lap. “I think want out.”

Kageyama watched him closely. It seemed Hinata had been doing a lot of thinking.

“If I had any other choice I would have been out the second I met you. I’m in too deep.” He blinked rapidly, eyes welling slightly. “I want to be with you. I want to have a future with you. I don’t want to have to resist holding your hand or wanting to touch you.  But if they find out, if, if-” Hinatas hands trembled and he took a deep breath. “I am not the worst thing that could happen to someone.”

Kageyama reached out and squeezed Hinatas hand quickly before letting go. He smiled at Hinata. “They won’t find out. I can hold my feelings in until its safe. Life isn’t easy but you will always have me by your side, no matter what. I need you to know that.”

Hinata stared at him blankly. His pupils dark and wide. Kageyama briefly wondered if he had said something he shouldn’t have.

Hinata breathed deeply. “God, Kageyama I want to kiss you so badly right now.” Blood rushed to Hinatas face as he continued to stare at Kageyama. “Never in a million years did I ever hope to have someone like you in my life.”

Kageyama smiled at him gently. “I could say the same thing about you.”

“Maybe one day we can be a normal couple. Who knows?” Hinata said hopefully, shrugging. He stood up and grabbed his bag. “I’m going to get changed into my swimming shorts. I’ll be back soon. You can go after me.”

Hinata jogged off to the changing rooms leaving Kageyama by himself. He slid his sunglasses down onto his nose and lay down on the towels. Hands propped behind his head. He understood Hinatas reluctance to talk to him, but Kageyama already knew too much. He reasoned there wasn’t much difference to knowing what he knew now and knowing the full story. Either way if he was caught out he would be dead so why not be there to help Hinata through it too. He wondered how hard it had been on Hinata growing up from such an early age having to deal with this burden single-handedly. It was unreal to think about the years he had been drowning alone, struggling to keep himself afloat.

Kageyama thought he had seen every one of Hinatas emotions but he wasn’t completely sure. One moment he was a sappy giggly mess, then he could be crying and a moment later he could be furious. How much of that was really a deflection of his true feelings that he was too afraid to share? Kageyama felt like he was slowly seeing the real Hinata, the serious, hopeful Hinata that dared to dream of a future where he wasn’t trapped in a life that he couldn’t escape from.

Kageyama wondered how many of his smiles in the past had been real.  

A wary thought popped into his head. It was the image of Hinata making him breakfast one morning handing him a coffee. It was an oddly comforting image to Kageyama. He wanted that. He wanted to wake up next to Hinata. He wanted to fall asleep with Hinata. There wasn’t a part of the day where he didn’t want to be with Hinata. He wanted to pull him out of the water, to save him from the depths that he had been suffocating in. Kageyama glazed at the sky, his sunglasses tinting the colours. He felt someone watching him; he sat up and lowered his sunglasses.

“Yes?”  He asked the girl standing over him. “Can I help you?”

The girl blushed softly, startled. “I uh, I just came to get our Frisbee.” She pointed to the pink Frisbee that was sitting on top of Hinatas towel next to him. Kageyama eyed it carefully, he had been deep in thought about Hinata and hadn’t heard it land right next to him.

“I was worried it had hit you…” She trailed off nervously.

“It didn’t.”

Kageyama reached over and grabbed it, he held it out to her and she grabbed it. She stood there watching him with a smile on her face. “Thanks.”

He raised an eyebrow at her when she didn’t leave. She just stood and stared at him. He was starting to get annoyed.

“Do you want something else?” He spat. As friendly as ever.

She smiled at him again. “Do you want to come play Frisbee with me er I mean us? We could grab some ice cream afterwards if you want?”

“Why would I want to do that?” Kageyama grunted. Obviously missing her point. “Frisbee is a horrible sport.”

“Well maybe later you and I could get something to eat. If you change your mind we’re just down the beach.” She waved and ran off down the beach.

“Frisbee, pfft. As if.” Kageyama grumbled.

“Frisbee?” He heard Hinata ask from behind him. “What about Frisbee? Who was that you were talking to?”

Hinata was standing with his hands on his hips, shirtless, with his bag slung over his shoulder. He was wearing the dark blue shorts that he had hunted for earlier. Kageyama could still clearly see the bruises that Hinata had gotten from his stepfather but they were starting to fade. Hinata did not look happy. He looked borderline irritated.

“Just some girl who wanted to play Frisbee with me and eat ice cream. But Frisbee is a weak game.” Kageyama turned around to look at Hinata and was surprised to see him in his swimming outfit. He stared at Hinatas toned chest for longer than he would have liked before noticing Hinatas mood.

“Kageyama you idiot.”

“What?” Kageyama was puzzled and still quite distracted by the shirtless Hinata standing in front of him. His skin was pale and shone softly in the sun. Kageyama was mesmerised.

“You turned a girl down because you don’t like Frisbee? That was your only reason?” Hinata pressed, folding his arms.

“Well I don’t like it. So yes?” He said offhandedly, completely preoccupied barely noticing the growing fury on Hinatas face.

“She was asking you out on a date and you only said no because you don’t like Frisbee?” Hinata grunted at him.

“Mmm hmm. Yes.” Kageyama eyes were devouring Hinata inch by inch. His brain was running on autopilot. “You should never wear shirts Shouyou.”

Hinata stomped his foot in anger and blushed furiously. “No! You can’t say that now and don’t use my name like that. I am angry at you!”

Kageyama tore his eyes away and saw the mixture of embarrassment and rage on Hinatas face.  
“Sorry what were you saying? I didn’t catch any of it…”

“KAGEYAMA!” Hinata yelled at him.

“Wait, you don’t mean that if I liked Frisbee I would go out with her? She wasn’t asking me out on a date, Hinata.”

“She was! That’s how girls talk.”

Kageyamas brain finally decided to start putting the pieces together. “Oh, OH! No! No Hinata, it’s not like that.” He held his hands up in defence. “Sorry! I was just so preoccupied and I just kinda zoned out and I wouldn’t ever see anyone else but you. There is no one else for me. Please Hinata.”

Hinata made a noise and sat down on the towel next to him. He lowered his voice, calming down. “Why were you preoccupied?”

Kageyama couldn’t look him in the eye, he glanced at the sand. “Oh please don’t make me say it.”

“Say it or I will get angry again.”

“By you.” Kageyamas eyes were wide and his face burned.

“By me? But it’s just me. You don’t randomly stop being able to function around me normally.”

“But you’re normally fully clothed. I’ve never seen you shirtless in the sunlight. You’re glowing. I can’t help but stare at you, you’re gorgeous Shouyou.” Kageyama looked into Hinatas eyes.

“K-K-Kageyama.” Hinata blushed the colour of his hair, his shoulders rising as if he was trying to hide from the embarrassment. “Oi, you can stop. I’m not angry anymore.”

“I’m serious.” Kageyama smiled.

“You should probably go get changed before I jump you.”

Kageyama smirked at the blushing Hinata. He liked the look Hinata was giving him. “I’ll be back soon, Don’t you go anywhere ok?”

Kageyama grabbed his bag and walked away down the beach. Hinata curled into a ball on the towels and focussed his mind. It had hurt to see Kageyama off in the distance obviously being hit on, but that feeling was leaving him quickly. He felt warm and fuzzy from Kageyamas words. He was starting to regret going to the beach, maybe staying home with Kageyama would have been a better idea. Where he could touch, hold and kiss him to his heart’s content. At least they could go back in the evening.

Hinata looked in the direction of the changing rooms, waiting for Kageyama to come back. He took out the volleyball that he had brought with him. He held it in his hands and spun it around in a circle. It felt natural in his hands. His eyes trained to survey his surroundings, lingered on some girls who were moving towards the changing rooms. They were far off and Hinata couldn’t see their faces but he felt uneasy. He had come to trust his gut feelings more and more with his line of work.

 He jumped to his feet and walked briskly towards the changing rooms holding the volleyball tightly, eyes locked on the girls who sat metres away from the men’s changing rooms. Hinata recognised the girl again. He was right to panic. He threw the volleyball up into the sky gently, acting as casually as he could. He watched the ball arc upwards and almost stop in mid-air before falling back down to him. Hinata crouched slightly and reached his hand back to serve the ball. Hinata closed his eyes, an old habit that wouldn’t die, and swung his arm down.

“Huh?” He gasped as his hand missed the ball; his eyes flicked open looking for the ball on the ground. He looked above his head and there was the ball. Kageyama had caught it and was holding it above Hinatas head. “Eh? Why’d you catch it Kageyama?”

Kageyama was wearing dark green shorts. Hinata was experiencing the same awe at Kageyamas exposed torso as he had earlier.

“More important why did you follow me?”

Hinata pouted, trying to reign in his ogling at Kageyama. “Reasons. Wanna toss to me? Or you wanna swim.”

Hinata pushed Kageyama back towards their towels, still watching the group of girls out of the corner of his eyes. He caught the girl he was afraid of seeing, looking at Kageyama lustfully. That was definitely not making Hinata feel better.

He was going to have to keep an eye on Kageyama, a very close eye on him.


End file.
